Part 1 - The Beginning
First… A few things to know
Bartending is a real job no matter how much fun it can be; and every job has a learning curve. There’s a multitude of books, manuals, tips and knowledge about the industry that, if written down, would make one hell of a dummies guide, and if aspiring bartenders actually took the time to read it all... they would never become a bartender. If you’re new to the industry and have this desire to need to know what you’re in for, here are our top things that every one of us wishes we had known before becoming bartenders. Many people go into bartending believing that it’s really easy, a fun job, and that they'll just be getting paid to hang out at the bar all day. It is a social job and you may have a lot of fun, but it’s also hard work, both mentally and physically. You'll be on your feet all day and you'll be dealing with a lot of people who may not be the nicest people you’d ever meet. and they will all want your attention.
Responsibility
Bartending comes with Responsibility. Being a bartender means that you’re responsible for “your bar.” That includes taking special care of the cash register, and often includes inventory, cleaning, maintenance, and making sure all of the necessary prep work is completed each night. It can give you a sense of ownership over your space, which is fulfilling, and it will earn you the respect of your employer and coworkers, but it means you can’t really phone it in; and you definitely don’t want to pass it off to someone who doesn’t have a vested interest.
Benefits
There are two basic issues here, one involves the actual health insurance carriers and the other is your boss. Insurance isn’t cheap, and for the most part, you will rarely work enough hours to be considered a fulltime employee. The magic number seems to be 30-32 hours a week, anything less than that and you’d be considered part-time and wouldn’t qualify for full benefits.
Most bartending jobs don't offer health insurance so be careful… and be aware, this is huge if you’re trying to provide for a family. Your boss has you as the main, day-time bartender, a five day a week job, from 11 to 5; but that only works out to 30 hours. The jury is still out as to whom to blame. Your boss may blame the health insurance carriers and the insurance carriers will blame your boss; but part-time employees rarely receive any benefits at all.
The Risks
If you serve too many drinks to someone who is already drunk and then they leave the bar, get in their car, and get into an accident, there’s a chance you'll find yourself in legal trouble. If you serve drinks to an underage individual even though their fake ID looks real to you, you may lose your job or even be prosecuted. Regardless of what management’s internal guidelines are, you are the one that can be held accountable. You should definitely be aware of the laws and your legal responsibilities when you’re taking on a bartender role.
Your Ego
As you get ready to leave your home and set off to start your shift, do yourself a huge favor; and leave your ego at the door as you are leaving. There is no benefit to having your customers feel that you think that you are “better” than them. They may decide that you won’t need them… or their tips. For a large part of your bartending career, your customers may feel that they are superior to you; and that being a bartender is going to be temporary for as long as it takes you to get a “real” job. Suck it up and get over it. Your customers will only know that you actually make more money than 80% of your clients if you tell them… and you want to keep it that way.
Upper Body Workout
Every shift is an eight-hour hand and arm workout. Of course, bartending is a physical job, but you don’t realize just how tiresome it is until you’ve had your first proper week behind the bar.
Between hauling kegs, restocking booze, and shaking cocktails, your body will suffer. If you work several shifts in a row, you may need to spend a day in bed to physically recover; but your biceps will thank you; and the countless cocktails you will make using your hands to pick up the bottles, twist them to the correct angle, and pour the drinks, will develop the muscle at the base of your thumb and index finger. It will become hard as a rock, and an easy “tell” that you spend a lot of time behind the bar.
Multi-Tasking
It’s all about Multi-Tasking. When I first started bartending, my greatest concern was my lack of knowledge, and remembering all the cocktail recipes. With access to all of the different drink manuals, (Old Mr. Boston kept behind the bar was my go-to at the time), and now the internet... the drink recipes were actually the easy part. One of the hardest parts of bartending is the multi-tasking. You will first be an entertainer and make drinks. You will have to take orders, settle tabs, while engaging patrons with an occasional joke and interesting conversation, all at the same time. Let’s not forget about learning how to do all this while handling the rush and remaining calm while dealing with the obnoxious asshole sitting in front of you.
Always Something to Do
As much as we enjoy being the life of the party, at the end of the day, bartending is not a glamorous job. You’re also the one taking out the trash, sweeping up broken glass, and could be the one mopping up a mess at the end of the night. Let’s not forget that if the toilet is backed up, and the maintenance crew doesn’t come in till closing, who do you think is going to handle it? Every shift could end with a humbling experience. Contrary to popular opinion, bartending is not a job for slackers. Because there are so many elements to maintaining a bar, there are always tasks to be done, even if the bar is empty. It can be thankless work, but that’s what you get paid for. If you have time to lean... you have time to clean.
Your Hands Will Be Destroyed
With building cocktails, hand-washing glassware, and dealing with lots of liquids, your hands will go through the ringer. If the bar you are working hasn’t invested in a dishwasher behind the bar, then you will be using the bar sinks, (hot water), diving into the ice bin (cold), and your hands will be constantly wet with the onset of early stages of arthritis… a definite possibility. Some bartenders will even develop fungal infections like bar rot on their hands. Manicures don’t last, and at the very least, you’ll have to invest in some quality hand moisturizer to counteract your work environment.
Bar “Friend” vs Real Friend
There is a difference between a bar friend and a real friend. It can be pretty confusing... are they a regular customer, or a bar “friend”? As a bartender, if you don’t count the hours in the day that you are sleeping, you tend to spend more time with your co-workers and regular customers, than your family and real friends. There will be a few that you will develop close bonds with; but some element of your relationship is still transactional.
Free Booze
You will begin to drink more and almost resent free booze… almost. At the start of your career, one of the perks of bartending is the access to “free” alcohol. You may also think that you’ll need that quick start just to put you in the right frame of mind to start your shift. Remember... the fact that alcohol is easily available doesn’t necessarily make it free unless you work it out with your boss first; but as time goes by, you’ll start to realize that drinking at work isn’t a benefit for anyone... not your customers, your employer, or you physically.
Awkward Moments
You will have awkward run-ins with acquaintances and the occasional ex. Bars are public places and, eventually, someone you don’t want to see will walk through the door. The fact that it’s your job to serve them compounds the awkwardness. When that guy who ghosted you brings his Tinder date in; or that first true love of your life from college stops by to celebrate his/her engagement, the best strategy is usually to be nice... and then kill them with kindness. A round of shots and a quick hello should be enough to prove you’re the bigger person.
Expectations
Working at the local dive bar in your hometown won’t cut it if your goal is the best dining experience in the big city. It will be more than just a little challenging. It will not prepare you for what is expected of you in a New York or Chicago bar and restaurant market. When you’re looking for a bar job in the biggest city in your state, most job listings will stipulate at least one year of big city bar experience. Extensive knowledge of wine, spirits, and various cuisines is taken as a given. On top of that, you must possess the ability to handle a high volume of guests with professionalism and accuracy with brownie points for good looks and an engaging personality.
Final Thoughts
You can tend bar at fancy five-star restaurants, country clubs, nightclubs, dive bars, or anywhere else that serves alcohol. Think carefully about where to apply so you can be sure to pick a setting that suits you. Be sure to spend time at any of the venues you're considering. Just to get a feel for its traffic and clientele. Just because you're a bartender doesn't mean you have to work at a typical bar. What about the bar cart at the zoo? The patio bar at the golf course? The bar on a restaurant's brunch patio? Or my personal favorite, the bar poolside at a Las Vegas resort.
There are several essential things you will have to know and/or work on… making drinks is only the beginning. Your personality, are you comfortable behind the bar you’ve chosen, your speed behind the bar, your common sense, knowledge, experience, attitude, do you use one hand or two? So much to learn but relax… you’ll have the time.
How to Become a Bartender
There are several areas to consider, but first and foremost, a bartending license isn't required in all states. Now that being said, the more knowledge you have, the easier it becomes to not only get a job, but you will be better at doing the job.
Bartending Schools
Graduating from a bartending course at your local college or an online bartending school wouldn’t hurt; and a Cicerone Certificate for beer or Sommelier training for wine can be a huge benefit, but again… not necessary. Check with the individual state requirements before applying for a job; and to receive a license, you'll also have to meet the minimum age for serving alcohol which differs from state to state. In addition to meeting state or local requirements, a bartender license course will ensure that you're familiar with the law and specifically addresses the following topics:
Online bartending certification is easy to find with a quick internet search, but make sure the course is state-approved; and to pass the course, you'll need to show that you have an understanding of state laws. It's also important to note that a bartending license doesn't guarantee employment, but the more knowledge you have, the better your chances.
Barback
The preferred method of getting into the bartending profession is as a barback, so leave your ego at home. The barback position requires no experience, but you will be required to work hard and as a barback you’ll be expected to do most of the manual work behind the bar, like cleaning, restocking, and most of the heavy lifting. The barback is essentially the bartender’s assistant; which will put your bartender in a “mentor” position as you learn and observe. Working as a barback isn’t easy, but it provides a lot of benefits while getting paid to learn. If you’re someone who has never worked in the bar or foodservice industries, you’ll gain an understanding of how the game is played. Always pay attention to what goes on around you and never stop learning. If you're starting out as a barback, here are some tips to help you:
Find a Mentor
As you seek employment in your new, chosen profession, find a mentor. Be on the lookout for a bartender who is willing to teach and share their knowledge. Over the years, my mentor taught me the profession extremely well, and we wound up working several bars and restaurants together over a twelve-year span. He grew to be my best friend, the best man at my wedding, and when my son was born, his godfather. But for now, just try to find a teacher.
If you are starting as a server, the more time you spend around the bar, the more likely you are to find a mentor. Follow these tips:
Pouring Drinks
Anyone can pour a gin and tonic into a glass and call it a cocktail. If you want to become a good bartender, you need to take the time to learn how to pour correctly. You must learn to achieve balance between the liquor and the mixers. Invest in some bartending tools and start practicing your pours at home. It’s amazing how easy it is to pour an ounce with just a little practice. A bottle filled with water, a pour spout and a shot glass… and practice. Jiggers are small cocktail measuring tools that allow you to control the amount of liquor you're pouring. With practice, you may be able to skip using a jigger and free pour instead. Free pouring is the art of pouring liquor using a silent count. With either pouring method, accurate pours are essential for several reasons:
Mixology
When you've mastered the art of pouring, try experimenting by making your own cocktails. You can start out by practicing with standard drink recipes like rum and coke, a vodka soda or a screwdriver and work your way up to more complicated cocktails that have multiple layers and mixes. Learn about ingredients like syrups and flavored bitters and the effects that they have on the alcohol you’re pouring. Not every bartender will be a mixologist, but it does help to have an understanding of how to build cocktails. A mixologist will craft cocktails and know their effect on how they pair with food; where as a bartender would rather focus on serving customers.
Final Thoughts
Be patient and available. Your bartending skills will take time to develop. You'll have to spend many hours before you gain the trust of management and the bartender. One of the most important things you can do is make sure they know you're available for whatever they need you to do. Always be ready to learn and absorb the knowledge that your bartender is trying to teach you and the more useful you can make yourself, the better.
Bartending 101
A bar owner/bar manager, who is responsible for training the new bartenders hired have many issues to consider. From hiring a “seasoned” bartender who knows nothing about how management wants things done, to a newbie, whose only claim to fame may be the bartender class he/she completed in college. In every case, management will need to deal with all the things that are specific to the bar you just joined. To be a successful bartender, you need to develop certain skills whether you’ve completed bartending qualifications or not. These skills will ensure that you leave a fantastic impression on your guests, so they come back in the future.
Learn the Bar
First things first, it's important to know the bar, so start asking questions. By asking questions and showing your interest in learning your way around the bar, it will have a positive impression on your new co-workers and managers. It's best to arrive early before your first shift to get a good grasp on where everything is. You'll probably be working with a senior bartender on your first shift so don't get worked up or nervous if you can't remember every beer, spirit or wine. They will be available to help you, so be sure to ask. Nothing removes confidence from patrons faster than a bartender that doesn't know his/her own bar.
Keep Busy
Any 'quiet' time is precious, as it allows you to stay focused, prepare for the next rush, and you can remain organized… this will minimize the chance of errors. There are many reasons why this is important; from keeping your guests entertained, to making the best first impressions to your boss. Avoiding unnecessary conversation at the bar will also be a benefit as you learn more about your customer base. If you're on the receiving end of a talkative customer and spot new customers waiting to be served, just politely excuse yourself to serve them before returning to the conversation you were having; that is of course, you have nothing else to do. The customers you just served will appreciate the quick service and your new friend will feel valued as you've returned to the conversation. It's easy on your first few shifts to feel completely out of place due to inexperience, but bartending isn't all about serving drinks.
Be Cool Under Pressure
If you’re working in a popular bar, then you’re going to have busy periods to deal with. It’s important you aren’t getting overwhelmed and you keep calm… even when others around you might begin to struggle. There’s no need to panic when the bar is busy. Work through each order quickly and effectively, help other bartenders if needed and do all of this with a smile on your face. Bartenders often work long hours and spend a lot of time on their feet. Even at the end of a busy night, you’ll need to greet each customer with the same outstanding service and make them feel special.
Make sure you’re ready for this by preparing for each shift in the right way. This can be getting a good night’s sleep, a healthy breakfast and always wear the correct uniform; whether it’s the bars requirements or your own common sense; and make sure you have the right shoes. Avoid turning up to your first shift in four-inch heels or your best pair of trainers. Spills will be plentiful, leading to potential safety concerns or ruined footwear. As you're going to be spending countless hours on your feet behind the bar, it's vital you invest in a comfortable pair of slip-resistant shoes.
Stay Focused
Whether it’s a hectic bar with impatient customers waving cash at you to take their order or dealing with a complaint, you need to be sure you’re calm and able to manage the situation professionally. Bartending is a profession that has a unique customer base, and no two shifts are the same. Always be prepared for a large group or an unusual order; that’s what makes bartending so much fun and rewarding. You never quite know what to expect on your shift. There’s no need to panic when the bar is busy. Work through each order quickly and effectively, help other bartenders if needed and do all of this with a smile on your face. You’ll feel better at the end of your shift and improved tips can be the result.
If it's one of your first shifts as a bartender, you're not going to be a pro overnight. Most people will realize you're new and they will be understanding if you're not the fastest at serving. Just make sure you get the orders correct and your customers will appreciate your attentiveness. If you panic and rush, there is a greater chance you will accidentally break a glass or get an order wrong. Mistakes cause the bar money, so take your time and pay attention.
A Good Memory
A good memory is vital as a bartender. A Manhattan, two Margheritas, a Moscow Mule and a Mojito can be challenging for a new bartender. Not only will you have to remember all of those drinks after the customer has ordered them, but you’ll also need to remember how to make them, who ordered them, and how much they cost. Make a slight mistake and you might have unhappy customers who didn’t get the drink they were expecting. Don’t be afraid to double check with them if you’re unsure about an order. It’s a great way of showing good customer service and ensures they get the exact drink they wanted.
Add a Little Flair
Go the extra mile and really put a smile on the faces of your customers by practicing your moves with cocktail shakers. Something as simple as lighting a woman’s cigarette to spinning the bar napkin in front of them, sometimes it’s the simple things that make the biggest impression. The very best bartenders can throw, spin, catch and even juggle their shakers to delight customers. It’s a great way of making sure your bar stands out from the competition. Because it’s so exciting, customers are likely to film you and post videos on social media. This is great publicity for the bar, boosting awareness and you might even find customers asking for you specifically in the future.
Be Proactive
There will be some quiet times, and these can offer great opportunities to see what you’re running out of and make sure all of the basic ingredients have been restocked to get ready for the busy times. It also gives you the chance to give the bar a good clean so it’s looking its absolute best before the evening rush. Polish glasses, wipe tables and organize the bar so that everything is easy to find during busy shifts; whether it’s getting ready for your happy hour or the next shift change.
Social Skills
This is necessary because you are dealing directly with customers. Generally, good social skills are needed as the very nature of the job is customer focused. That’s why a great bartender will have a charismatic and sociable personality. It helps them to connect with customers and develop the skills necessary to improve the customer base. Although bartenders aren’t the only impression of an establishment the guests will get, customer service still plays a significant role. In certain situations, it can even be the difference between a customer returning to the bar and improving the cash flow for the establishment AND the bartender.
The Terminology
It is extremely important to have a basic understanding of the terminology used in bars and restaurants. Knowing the basic cocktail recipes and bar phrases is critical. Here are a few of the most common phrases and what they mean:
On the rocks - Simply means a drink with ice.
Chaser - In bar terms, this means anything consumed quickly after a shot of alcohol.
Neat or Straight - If somebody asks for a drink neat or straight, it means without ice. This is usually used in conjunction with whiskey.
Mixer - Any non-alcoholic drink that accompanies an alcohol is called a mixer. E.g. vodka and tonic.
Excellent Money Handling
When the bar starts filling up and eager customers are waiting to be served, they’ll rely on you to take their order quickly. They’ll also expect their change in the same manner. Having good money handling skills will reduce the likelihood of customers becoming upset and management billing you for any shortages. This will also allow you to take orders more efficiently; plus, knowing how to use the Point-of-Sale (POS) software and card machines is advantageous in today’s world where many individuals use contactless payment.
Remember to Clean
As the bar can be very busy one minute to very quiet the next, it's important to take advantage of the quiet times to clean up. You will be reminded of this often, but if you have time to lean… you have time to clean.
Remove dirty glasses from the bar as they appear and make sure you have clean glasses available for the next round of drinks. As you wipe down the bar, take care of the tables as you can and remove any litter from the floor. Bar areas can be full of health and safety hazards like broken glass and slippery floors, and it's your responsibility to clean the area, whether it’s the area you are responsible for or one of your coworkers’. As you clean you are removing potentially dangerous hazards as well as keeping the area clean for the next bar patron.
Collect Orders, Then Serve
Attempting to serve drinks on a one-by-one basis or building drinks using only one hand instead of two, are rookie mistakes that you will eventually outgrow. It slows down your customer service and you will work harder and longer for the results. Whether taking an order for two or more in the group, to taking an order for an entire table before walking back to the well; it gives you a sense of accomplishment and avoids the drama of one person's drink arriving quicker and another one taking longer than usual.
If it's taking a while for you to build your confidence to take multiple drink orders at a time, ask one of your colleagues to help you. Don't worry, as your confidence grows, this will get easier. Also, if a round of drinks starts getting complicated and customers are struggling to remember it themselves; then we advise stopping, slowing it down and running through the whole order. Smile and explain you're new. Customers will appreciate you making sure you get their order right and it will be quicker than getting it wrong and correcting the mistakes.
Final Thoughts
And finally, keep your ego intact, but you should consider losing it completely when you step behind the bar. By far, this is one of the most important qualities if you're going to be a successful bartender. Throughout your time working behind the bar, you'll experience all types of customers with several different personalities; some good, some bad. What's important is that anything said to you cannot be taken seriously.
It's important to know the difference between someone being a little silly and outright harassment. If you ever feel like you're being harassed by a customer, be sure to report it to your manager.
Myths About Bartenders
It’s hard convincing our patrons that we are, in fact bartenders, not marriage counselors or priests, or the all- knowing and caring confidant.
A Patron’s Name
Contrary to popular belief we do not remember every single customer’s name. We see many different faces and meet new people every time we work. Often, we’ll remember what your usual drink order is but we’re not sure if you’re named Matt, Jim, or Don. Sometimes it takes a while for “Jack & Coke guy” to become “Steve” when we see you walk through the door; but as a general rule. it’s easier for a bartender to remember your drink than your name. On occasion, I have been known to remember a phone number slipped to me by an attractive guest 6 months ago. after I served her a “special” cocktail… but never her name.
The Short Pour
We short pour your drink unless you ask us to “make it strong.” Your drink contains the standard amount of alcohol that is specific for the bar requirements where you chose to order your drink. This amount is not up to your bartender but up to the owner of the bar and/or liquor laws that can vary from state to state. If you want a stronger drink, order a double. Asking for a “strong” drink is essentially asking for something for free. If you are already a regular patron, you’ll never have to ask.
Getting Cut-Off
We aren’t being uptight assholes when we cut you off. We don’t want to have to say no to your money, but when we decide you’ve had enough, it’s safe to say that you have definitely reached your limit. Nobody wants to clean up your puke or be held responsible when you are involved in an accident while inebriated. At the end of the day, we have your best interests in mind, so please don’t make a scene when we cut you off. Being dramatic only makes YOU look bad. Leave peacefully and come back for a hair-of-the-dog beverage in the morning! We have no problem calling for a ride to get you home safely, then you can come back tomorrow.
Bartending Schools
The fact that we all have to go to a bartending school is a huge issue for most of us. With 15 years of actual bartending experience under my belt, I have not once worked with someone who graduated from a bartending school. A point of fact… I was the first bartender instructor at a successful bartender school many… many years ago; but my own personal opinion is don’t waste your money. If you want to get into the field, apply somewhere that promotes their barbacks so that you can get training for free and earn money while you learn the ropes. Experience behind a bar is always more desirable than a bartending school certificate. A good bartending school should teach you the basics but will probably not include topics that include the interaction and cohesiveness between your personality, your boss, and your customers.
We Like Everyone
While we don’t necessarily hate everyone sitting at our bar, chances are that we aren’t as excited as your customers may think when pretending to be happy when they walk in the door. Inquiring about your dog, baby, partner, or new job is part of our game. There will be times that we truly are interested in your life, but the bottom line is that we ask patrons questions to keep them drinking and tipping.
The more we can interact with our customers, the longer they stay, and the more often they come to visit. We have our own social life outside of the bar and we like to keep it separate from work. Don’t be offended when we aren’t accepting applications for new friends.
Advice
We can give great relationship advice to those customers that don’t know any better; but we probably don’t have a certificate to prove we should. We are all human beings and are just as lost as everyone else in this department. Also… we are always going to tell our customer what we think they want to hear because they are tipping us, especially if they are asking us for advice after their 4th glass of wine, with tears streaming down their face. Hopefully that customer will not remember the conversation or advice when they wake up… and you still have a customer.
Our Personal Life
Our life is truly not a non-stop, alcohol-fueled party. When you spend 4-5 days a week working in a bar, hanging out on one on our days off is not your go-to social activity. I find myself saving such occasions for when a band I want to see is performing or when there’s a special celebration. Plus, hangovers are the worst when you are behind the bar; having to put on a happy front while trying not to let the smell of the alcohol you are pouring make you vomit. As a general rule, at least one of our days off is going to be spent doing the fun stuff… laundry… food shopping… dry cleaning… house cleaning… you know, the fun stuff.
A Glamorous Lifestyle
Our job is easy and glamorous only from our customer’s point of view. Yes, we are pretty much celebrities to our adoring audience of customers when we dispense liquid cheer from behind the bar; but, as soon as the night comes to an end and the lights are turned up, our gleaming mansion of a bar suddenly becomes a sticky, stained-up, trash-covered shack. Guess who is responsible for cleaning up the mess?
Our Drink Knowledge
Do you really think we should know how to make every drink that ever existed? No, we don’t. Your customers irritation when you don’t know how to make that special new cocktail will get on your nerves, sometimes sooner than later; take a couple of deep breathes and move on. New recipes are constantly being created and some recipes are region-specific or seasonal, so don’t be surprised if your bartender in Minneapolis doesn’t know what was in the passion fruit margarita you had in Cabo. If a customer is looking for something creative, show them the specialty cocktail menu; and hopefully you’ve been trained on that. If you don’t have a special drink menu, have them order a simple cocktail and keep your mouth shut regarding anything containing passion fruit. Our patience is non-existent on this matter. It's crucial that you have a good memory for many cocktail recipes if you’re planning on being a good bartender. This isn't as big of a deal at dive bars where most patrons order fairly classic drinks or a simple shot and a beer; but at a cocktail lounge or bars in high-traffic areas, many patrons will want something new, special, obscure, or high-end. A trained mixologist can create a cocktail based on the food you plan on having for dinner, but common sense is a requirement.
We’re Losers
We are all brainless losers who can’t find a “real job.” The major perks of bartending are the quick cash and the flexible schedule. Many of us choose this career because it allows us to travel, go to school, create art or music, and have an abundance of sex; while others simply enjoy living their lives outside of the 9-5 rat race. We are an interesting breed of eclectically-talented individuals and you will find many college degrees among our ranks. For some of us, this job is a pit stop along the path, and for others, it’s a life-long career; in either case, don’t assume we are uneducated… that’s just shows your ignorance.
Our Personal Choice
We have a favorite drink to make? Really? Hopefully they won’t ask. A bottle of whiskey feels the same as a bottle vodka. Certain time-consuming drinks can become loathsome when the bar is filled with people waiting (think mojito or old fashioned), but if we aren’t in the weeds, we’ll happily bust out the muddler. But a customer needs to be aware of bartender retaliation when we respond to the inane question with something that we are sure they won’t like… and please… please don’t order a Ramos Fizz at the height of happy hour.
Final Thoughts
There’s a lot to learn and it can be challenging; but keep your ego in check until you actually learn the job and can call yourself a bartender. For those moments when your actual time behind the bar and the job you get paid to do becomes a gray area and the lines become blurred, take a deep breath and work through it. Remember, you’re on stage; and it may help if you keep your personal life and bartending career separate. Hanging out with other bartenders and staff is acceptable and will help keep you grounded and sane but be careful when bringing your regular customers into the mix.
You’re Not a True Bartender Until…
Being a bartender can be fun, and a fast-paced way to pay the bills; but it certainly isn’t considered glamorous. You are not a true bartender until…
Basic Needs
You can put aside your basic human needs for food, water, and bathroom breaks. If you are working a double or an insanely busy shift, it can be almost impossible to sneak in a break. Sometimes you just have to dig deep, snack on some cocktail olives, and coast off adrenaline until the rush has passed and you can use “restocking” as an excuse to go to the bathroom or eat a snack in the liquor room.
Multi-Tasking Motherfucker
You can multitask like a motherfucker and be proud. Working at a bar or restaurant is a lot like being a parent. You have a constant to-do list cycling through your brain while surrounded by people seeking your attention. At first, it is overwhelming, like having a newborn; but you know you are getting the hang of bartending when you can make drinks, take orders, run credit cards, and flirt with the cutie at the bar, all at the same time.
Four Cocktails at a Time
You can build at least four cocktails at the same time and still talk to the hot server that is waiting for you to complete their order. Some cocktail bartenders may argue about this one, saying it’s better to focus on one or two drinks at a time, but I call bullshit. When you are slammed, and you have to pump out the martinis as fast as you can, it’s all about efficiency. You know you are really good when you are making drinks faster than the servers can run them.
You’re Crying
Eventually you learn to like the tingle of lemon juice burrowing into every little cut on your hand; but it will take time. No matter how careful you are when prepping fruit, you will constantly have tiny cuts on your hands. Whenever you grab a lemon to garnish a whiskey sour or spill a bit of lime juice when making a margarita, you will feel the burn. Eventually, you just accept that citrus is nature’s disinfectant and get on with your day. You’ve cried after spilling a vat of Bloody Mary mix. At some point in your bartending career, you will likely have to work brunch, especially if you work in a large US city. It’s a rite of passage: pumping out pitchers of mimosas, and champagne cocktails, perfecting your cappuccino foam, learning how to diplomatically cut off drunken customers after a two-hour unlimited boozy brunch. But at some point, usually on a Sunday morning when running behind on set-up, you will have a nervous breakdown.
Double Shifts
You can pull off a fourteen-hour shift on three hours of sleep. Whether you pissed off the manager or you’re covering someone’s vacation time, you will have to work a closing shift followed by a double at some point. Often this means getting home at 3 or 4 AM and returning to work at 8 or 9 AM. Luckily, the fear of oversleeping will cause “wait-mares” or waiter/bartender stress dreams that keep you tossing and turning until you force yourself out of bed. At the end of your shift, you will collapse into the nearest bar stool, too tired to even drink. You will promise yourself, “Never again.” But there is always a next time.
You Smell
Your boyfriend/girlfriend kicks you out of bed for smelling like a combination scotch/beer cocktail. There are certain smells that linger on a person. When your final bar guests close out with a round of peaty scotch, your hands will smell like whiskey and gym socks for at least a few hours afterward, even with a vigorous hand-washing. Your best bet? Take a post-shift shower to wash off the stale beer and eau de tequila. Or relegate yourself to sleeping on the couch.
Karma
No matter how shitty you feel, you can always make someone else’s day. The best and worst part of working in the service industry is that, at the end of the day, it is not about you.
No matter how tired you are, how crappy your day was, how annoying your coworkers are, your job is to help someone else forget their troubles so that they can feel better and get on with their life. Take advantage of those moments and “pay-it-forward”.
Hangovers
You can work through a hangover… trust me. One of the key skills you acquire as a bartender is the ability to power through a shift no matter how much you’ve had to drink the night before or how bad the hangover. Sometimes, a hangover makes you better at your job; it becomes pure muscle memory. Yes, making a pre-noon old-fashion for the brunch crowd will make you feel slightly nauseous, but you are a professional, dammit! Take a shot and power through.
Final Thoughts
It will take time, patience, and an understanding of people before you can call yourself a true bartender. Make the time and put in the effort and anything can be possible; but for now, learning the basics is the first step. You may find that you are more comfortable in a local dive bar than a fine dining establishment or a high energy nightclub scene, but only time will tell.
Part 2 - You Made It
Rites Of Passage
All bartenders go through them: just like circumcision, bar mitzvahs or braces, there are certain rites of passage that take you from baby (bartender) to grown-ass bartender. From breaking a glass in the ice bin to being passed your first phone number from a stranger, here are a few of our favorite coming of age moments behind the bar.
Getting Your Ass Kicked
To become a solid bartender, you will have to take a trip to the weeds. Whether it happens when the stadium across the street empties after a game or parents need to celebrate after they survive a day of teacher’s conferences; it’s those moments when you are completely swamped behind the bar that will teach you how to be a better bartender. You can memorize all the cocktail recipes you want, but it means nothing if you can’t pay attention and prioritize. Your first crazy shift will be daunting, but you will gain a lot of confidence, hopefully a few more tips than you’re used to, and, if you survive, you will be on your way to becoming a better bartender.
Mishaps Under Pressure
You will need to learn how to handle the pressure, and the mishaps that go with it. It’s only a matter of time before you get beer foam in your face when changing kegs or when the keg blows while you are pouring a pint, you will break a glass in the ice bin at the worst possible moment, or you slice your index finger while cutting fruit, and you break a bottle or shatter a glass. You will take a breath and move through it and no doubt do it again.
Cutting People Off
This is a moment that usually catches you unaware. Everything is going well, you are making drinks, talking to your customers, and when you look over, a bar guest has gone from tipsy to wasted and falls off his stool while trying to find the bathroom. You are the one responsible and navigating this situation is a must. Do the best you can to be polite, direct, while ensuring everyone’s safety. You, and your employer, are responsible for making sure everyone gets home safe; (whether you are calling their wife... husband... or Uber). In most states, it’s against the law to serve alcohol to a customer who is legally drunk; and you can be held legally responsible. Depending on the individual state laws, “legally” drunk could be the effect just two double martinis have on a 110-pound patron in less than 20 minutes. You will need to learn to watch out for the red flags.
Faking It Till You Make It
In the beginning, maybe during your first year or so as a bartender, there will be many times where you feel uncomfortable, like you don’t belong... you feel like an imposter. Like when you realize you made a drink incorrectly, as someone is sipping it. Or you have no idea how to answer a question about a certain liquor or wine. If the guest seems like they know their stuff, you can fess up and admit that you are still learning the ropes. If the guest seems like the vodka cranberry type, play it off, it’s okay. In this day, and age, the internet and googling questions will give answers faster than you, and all your customers, can think.
The ”Flow”
The “Flow”, that first night that everything comes together and you feel completely in sync is a very powerful moment. It’s like riding a bike for the first time. You have that moment of “damn I’m good, I can do this.” It’s also the first time you actually feel like a bartender… and at that point, you rule the world.
Getting That First Phone Number
When you first start bartending, you are focusing really hard on your job while trying to keep every body happy. As you get more experienced, you realize you can focus on more than one thing at a time… like flirting. Even if you are not interested in the person, there is no ego boost more satisfying than having a bar guest leave you a number with their credit card slip; and the added result may be a better tip.
Bartending While Tipsy
No one should endorse or recommend said action, but the first time that you realize that you can still do your job while drinking… is a moment. It’s a slippery slope, of course, but depending on the bar, it can be a useful skill... but be very... very... careful; your employer/manager may not share your zeal.
Blaming it on the Fernet
They call Fernet-Branca “the bartender’s handshake” for a reason, (more of an east coast thing but we have all been known to use it. A shot of tequila is the west coast alternative). You can always trace a crazy night back to the Fernet shot, or tequila, that started it all. You know you are a real bartender when you start cursing the Fernet bottle behind you; or any other bottle your customers have known you to drink... mine was always that shot of tequila.
Final Thoughts
You made it, and even management will call you a good bartender; but take a deep breath and relax. The mistakes made at the beginning of your career may still happen to you, just not as often… but this time you’ll take it with a grain of salt. As you mumble a quick “oh shit”, you’ll get over it and take care of business.
The Signs That You’re a Rookie Bartender
My apologies, but bartending schools are a total scam. They will only teach you “their” way, which may not be the way your new employer wants you to do things. Every bar and employer will have their own set of rules, and their own set of unique customers. The only way to learn how to bartend is by bartending; and the only way to really excel in the industry is to make a few mistakes... and hopefully, you will learn from those mistakes. From creating the wrong drink, to smashing glasses, to drinking on the job, to visibly counting while you pour, and only using one hand instead of two, here are a few signs you are a rookie bartender.
Glassware
A rocks glass, hi-ball, colins, hurricane, white wine glass, red wine glass, Bordeaux glass, champagne flute, sour glass, and multiple beer mugs.
Choosing the correct glass for the right cocktail is critical in so many different ways. It effects the look of the drink, the correct amount of the ingredients which will affect its taste, the pouring cost (profitability), drink consistency… so many options, so little time. It will usually be the same amount of alcohol, but a 12-ounce glass will have considerably more room to put more ice and mix than an 8-ounce rocks glass, totally screwing up the drink recipe.
The “Count”
You are seen counting when you pour. All bartenders use a count system to time their pours, for the old timers, it comes naturally. Over time a bartender will know what two ounces feels like from muscle memory without the extra step of using a jigger to measure. If you watch carefully, you can catch new bartenders subconsciously mouthing the count as they pour a drink. This is also very easy to practice. Simply fill a bottle with water and using the same pour spout you would when behind the bar… practice pouring, while keeping tract of the amount of the pour. It won’t take you very long to realize the time it takes to pour an ounce.
The Mixing Tins
The tins, and how you shake them. Every bartender develops a signature shake over time. It is your calling card, the most efficient motion for you to deliver beautiful cocktails. The angle you hold the tins... the number of times you shake them... how you separate them... how you pour... bartenders fumbling with their tins with no sense of rhythm or confidence are definitely rookies.
Pay Attention
You’re so busy focusing on making drinks that you’re not paying attention to your bar. At the beginning, you have a lot going through your head during a shift.
Drink recipes to remember, cocktail-making techniques to master, counting, all with a focus on speed and accuracy. But sometimes all this focus distracts you from the most important part of bartending, the entertainment factor... chatting with your guests. Whether it is flirting with attractive singles or schmoozing regulars, your personality is just as important as your drinks. A bad cocktail can be corrected, a bad personality will cost you customers.
Taking A Shot
You take a shot every time a guest wants to drink with you. Regular customers love drinking with their bartender, and you don’t ever want to say no. If you are bartending several nights a week, your liver will need a night off. There are many alcohol-free drinks at your disposal and your customer won’t care, it’s the opportunity to bond with his bartender that’s important. Filling a tequila bottle with water and taking pretend shots all night long, is rude, unethical, and depending on the state that you live in... down-right illegal. If you have any sort of drinking problem or you tend to have trouble doing things in moderation, then working as a bartender may not be a good life choice for you.
Unwanted Attention
You don’t have a tactic to deflect unwanted attention but will definitely need one. If you bartend, you will, at some point, find yourself on the receiving end of unwanted attention. It could be a guest asking for your number, or coffee when you get off your shift. Or a co-worker angling for “friends with benefits.” Whatever it is, when it is unwanted, you need a strategy. You don’t want to lose a potential customer or piss off a co-worker, so the ability to deliver a firm, but polite “no” is extremely important.
Pay Attention – Yet Again
You prepped too much fruit for garnishes, but you forgot to chill the rosé. A bartender must anticipate the needs of the shift, depending on time of day and season, and adjust their preparations accordingly. Even with a checklist for review, setting up a bar is never an exact science. Unfortunately, you have to screw up a few times to learn how to anticipate; and work on what is really important.
Working Through the Screwups
You have sprayed beer all over yourself while changing a keg. Changing a keg can be more complicated than it looks. If you aren’t careful, you can get a face full of beer spray for your efforts. Take your time and pay attention or you’ll smell like a brewery during your shift. Opening warm bottled beer not stored correctly, can have the same effect.
Final Thoughts
The quickest and easiest way to learn the job is to first realize just how much you don’t know and go from there. Put in the effort to learn how and more importantly, why things are done. It is totally acceptable to ask questions when you’re new and everyone you work with will understand. Practice your craft during the down times and remember … if you have time to lean, you have time to clean.
The Ten Commandments
The ten commandments of being a bartender. Becoming a bartender may seem like a glamorous job for the young and want-to-be party animals, but it’s much more than that. Becoming a “Professional” bartender takes time, specific social skills, some unique abilities, and the respect of unspoken rules. Here are 10 commandments every good bartender in the world knows to follow.
Thou Shalt Pay Attention to Expirations
Thou shalt never forget to check the expiration dates. This applies to your “fresh” fruit garnish as well as the fruit juices. It may seem obvious, but you’d be surprised at how a bottle of grapefruit juice, OJ or a pint of milk can lurk in the back of your bar fridge. The worst culprits are open cans of juice and soda. If you work at a bar without a soda gun, you must dump that shit at the end of the night.
Thou Shalt Restock the Bar
Thou shalt always restock the bar. It’s bartender karma. There’s nothing worse than walking into your opening shift to twice as much work as usual. Your bar should be left the way you would want to see it when you start your shift. This also applies to keeping your bar clean. Let’s not forget, if you have time to lean... you have time to clean, (you’ll be reminded of this often).
Thou Shalt Not Get Drunk
Thou shalt never get so drunk that you can’t count the money. Bartenders are often encouraged to drink a little during their shift, whether a regular wants to buy them a shot or the staff needs a morale booster. But you have to know your limits. Because at the end of the night, it’s your job on the line (and possibly your money), if you make a mistake while closing out the register.
Thou Shalt Never Build Out of Order
Thou shalt never build a cocktail with liquor first. When assembling a drink, the classic rule of thumb is to start with your juices and syrups, then add in the liquor component of the recipe. Mainly because if you make a mistake while making the drink, it’s far cheaper to dump out an ounce of lemon juice than two ounces of tequila and some triple sec; and let’s not forget that if the liquor is the last thing you pour... it’s also the first thing your customer tastes. You’ll never be accused of short pouring.
Thou Shalt Always Hold Glassware Correctly
No one wants your dirty bartender hands near the lip of their glass when they are taking a sip. And let’s not forget that wine should be served properly chilled, (red and white). Rarely is it served at “room” temperature and your hand can warm the wine when it should usually be chilled. “Room” temperature will have a different definition at noon in Phoenix,, Arizona then it does in Anchorage, Alaska.
Thou Shalt Always Burn the Ice
Thou shalt never forget to burn the ice at the end of the day. Every bartender must make sure their ice bins are empty, clean, and dry at the end of the night. Mostly for sanitation reasons, but also as a deterrent to the greatest of bar scourges ... the fruit fly. Any standing water, even a coin-sized amount, can become a breeding ground for those bastards. Contrary to popular belief, fruit flies aren’t drawn to your bar because of the fruit garnish.
Thou Shalt Never Forget to Upsell
Thou shalt not forget to upsell on liquor. You never know how much money a guest is going to spend. You don’t have to be pushy, but offering Ketel One for that Vodka Soda or suggesting Plymouth when someone orders a Martini can really bring up those check averages. Let’s not forget that usually, your gratuity is based on the final check... the higher the check... the higher your tip; and the increased sales will help keep your bosses happy.
Thou Shalt Never use a Glass as an Ice Scoop
Thou shalt never use a glass to shove into your ice bin because you are too lazy to use the metal ice scoop provided. And always be careful holding glass anywhere near the ice bin; because if/when it falls, it will shatter into a million pieces right over your ice... which is one of the most annoying things that can happen during service... enough said.
Thou Shalt Never Sleep With Your Regulars
Thou shalt never sleep with your regulars. Now this will be a tough one. Male or female, if you are single, it’s bound to happen eventually. Unless you are both super chill, avoid this like the plague. You can lose a great customer, their tips, or worse, have to serve your one-night stand on their future dates. Save your flirtations for the cutie that’s just in town for the weekend; or your hustle at your favorite dive bar down the street.
Thou Shalt Never Make Excuses
In this business, bar or restaurant, if something needs to be done, just do it... it’s everyone’s job. A drunk customer knocks over a tray of drinks? Whoever is closest should clean it up. Customer complains the toilet is backing up? Find someone to help. The phone rings? Okay, in this case, let it ring a few times and hopefully someone else will pick it up.
Final Thoughts
These 10 commandments will soon become 20, and possibly more. That will be determined by just how lazy the previous bartender has been and just how good your current management is.
Part 3 - You’re a Bartender
The Signs You’ve Made It as a Bartender
Bartenders aren’t born, they’re made by spending time behind the bar. From being a person who is able to have small talk with anyone to preferring to work weekends and evenings, here are a few signs you’re ready to call yourself a bartender.
Your Hands Hurt
Your weekly salon manicures will not seem adequate. Bartending wreaks havoc on your hands. From garnish prep to opening sharp-foiled wine bottles to hand-washing glassware, your hands do battle behind the bar; and God forbid you lose the battle between shattered glasses. If your hands aren’t covered in little cuts and your nail polish isn’t chipped, you’re not bartending hard enough.
14 Hour Days
Long shifts are a necessary evil, and a badge of honor for bartenders. It’s not for the weak minded but 14 hours on your feet is weirdly less tiring than 14 hours working a computer. It takes a while to adjust to standing for hours on end, but once you do, your legs adapt. Make sure you’re wearing some very comfortable, non-slip, work shoes... to help the process.
Working Weekends
And you actually prefer it. At first, working weekends can feel like the pits as you constantly miss out on friends’ parties and weekend getaways. But over time, you learn that working weekends can actually be a perk. You have weekdays off to run errands, go shopping, and lounge on an empty beach. The more time you spend behind the bar, the less desire you have to be on the other side of a packed bar on a Saturday night.
Shots are Considered Perfect
You begin to think shots are a perfectly acceptable way to consume alcohol. Most people leave shots behind with their college days, but bartenders know that shots aren’t really about getting plastered ... they’re about camaraderie. They’re also the perfect fuel when you’re working a crazy Saturday night shift and you need a little energy boost to power through. Proceed with caution, however. Shots are sneaky and they hit you much harder when you don’t have work adrenaline pumping through your veins.
Small Talk
You can make small talk with anyone. Bartending is more than just making drinks, you become the entertainment. It’s about making your bar guests feel comfortable. It’s sort of like hosting a small cocktail party every night and you’re the center of attention. Part of that means engaging with people from all walks of life. The more topics you can take about, the easier it is to connect with guests who you’ve just met. Of course, if you do find the guest that you’re not comfortable with, simply introduce them to one of their neighbors on the bar... they’ll entertain each other.
Your Drink Choices
You either order the most adventurous drink on the menu or the cheapest beer. Because we’re exposed to so many different spirits, beers, and wines, we tend to develop an adventurous palate when it comes to ourselves. When we go out to drink, we either want to try the most obscure cocktails or we want the exact opposite ... the coldest, cheapest beer we can find. When you spend your days thinking about drinks, it’s the last thing you want to do in your free time.
Multi-tasking Ninja
Working at a bar or restaurant is a lot like being a parent. You have a constant to-do list cycling through your brain while surrounded by people seeking your attention. At first, it’s overwhelming, but you know you’re getting the hang of it when you can make drinks, take orders, run credit cards, and flirt with the babe at the bar... all at the same time.
Final Thoughts
It comes naturally for you, and you are on stage the moment you step behind the bar. A Professional Bartender is not to be confused with a Mixologist. On rare occasions, they can be one and the same, but I have found that a good Mixologist spends much of their time behind the bar creating the perfect cocktail while a good Bartender spends much of their time talking shit to their entire bar, while making drinks as fast as they can. Only management can decide which type they want behind the bar; but a good bartender can do a little of both.
Secrets We Want You to Know
From those deep confessions that come out after a few drinks to the number of different dates you bring in every week, we’ve got your trust. We rarely, however, are as open with our guests about our own secrets. Behind the curtain, here are six secrets bartenders want you to know about.
Our “Real” Job
For many of us, this is our “real” job. One of the most common questions that bartenders get is “what do you really do?” In some ways, it shows a customer is trying to form a connection and get to know you. But their question, while seemingly innocent, undermines the work that we do. Some of us are professional bartenders, and that’s it. And even if we are actors, photographers, or yoga teachers, we don’t always want to talk about that part of our lives while we are working. The best approach is to let information about our lives be revealed organically. A Professional Bartender is to be admired for their knowledge and experience; and not be looked at as a want-to-be actor or musician.
Shots Not Necessary
Please, you never need to buy us shots. The impulse is sweet, but if it is the kind of bar where we can take shots with a guest, it’s the kind of bar where we can pour our own shots. If we want to do a shot with you, we will. That said, we do appreciate the thought, but don’t be offended if we turn it down.
Hating Our Friends
We kind of hate it when our friends visit. Having a job where your friends can visit you while you work can rarely be a great perk. It’s very distracting. When we are busy, we feel guilty because we can’t give our friends any real attention. When it’s slow or we’re tired, we just want to close early and go home, but we often feel obligated to entertain our friends.
About Your Cocktail
A lot of bartenders don’t really care about the cocktails they create. There are some bartenders who are truly at the peak of the industry. They are knowledgeable, creative, and care deeply about their craft. On the flipside, there are just as many, if not more, who couldn’t care less about the difference between a Manhattan and an Old Fashioned. That doesn’t mean they won’t make you a good cocktail; but it does mean they might not be open to a lengthy discussion about the difference between rye or bourbon in their drink request with a guest.
Closing Time
Closing time is not a suggestion unless we say it is and time permits. On occasion, we pull the gates, lock the door, and let our friends hangout after hours; but in general, closing time is closing time. For bars with bouncers, this is easier to enforce because the bouncer will round up the revelers and show them the door. Every state has their own particular laws governing when we can no longer sell an alcoholic beverage, but at a restaurant bar, if it’s midnight, the kitchen is closed, the chairs are stacked, and the music is low, it’s time to go.
Free Drinks
Our ability to give out free drinks varies greatly based on where we work… and our attitude. Every bar and restaurant will set their own policies on buybacks and comps and enforces them with varying degrees of strictness. As a bartender, your friends are will come to visit and will probably expect free drinks or cheap drinks that are stronger than what you would normally serve. How you deal with this depends on you, the relationship you have with your friends, and the rules of the place you’re working at. As bartenders, we have the ability and some power to use our own discretion, but if the bar is particularly rigid about free drinks, we may not be able to offer anything, even if we think it is appropriate. Ultimately, management dictates how much freedom a staff can has, and your patronage is not worth my job.
Final Thoughts
For most of us, this is common sense, but it’s important to realize that your customers will usually leave their common sense at the door of their house, as they leave to come to see you. So please… have a little patience while you teach them how you would like them to behave.
The Things Bartenders Will Never Say
Bartenders talk a lot, it’s a necessary part of the job; but after years behind the bar, we know that there are certain things that will or should never be uttered. Here are a few things you’ll never hear a bartender say.
I’m A Bartender
Of course, if someone asks about what we do, we don’t hide it, but we tend not to offer up that information, especially when we’re out at someone else’s bar or restaurant. Usually, bartenders can spot fellow bartenders anyway, but there is something that feels disrespectful about bringing it up. It feels like we’re fishing for free drinks, even if that’s not true.
What’s Your Favorite Drink?
This is the single most irritating question to ask a bartender, therefore, you’ll never hear us ask someone else. We will ask another bartender for recommendations or specifics on a cocktail, but never this question because the answer has very little relevance to what we might enjoy.
I Love Brunch
Bartending ruins brunch. Either you have PTSD from years spent bartending brunch or you’re so exhausted on weekend mornings from working until 5:00 AM that the last thing you want to do is rush to a crowded restaurant the minute you wake up. Brunch can be a beautiful thing, but bartenders hardly ever enjoy it.
I Don’t do Shots
Of course, one probably shouldn’t do shots. Things never end particularly well when shots are involved. But there is something about the camaraderie of shots that gets us every time. And after all, even bartenders need to cut lose every so often.
The “Well” is Fine
When at a dive bar, we drink like it. But, in general, we’re picky about what we drink, especially if we’re having a martini or a spirit neat. If we’re going to have a drink, we’ll pay the $5 extra and have a tasty one.
Can You Remake This Drink?
Even if another bartender completely botches our cocktail order, we will never send a drink back; and we’ll probably drink it all. We’re not saying this is the correct way to handle said situation, we just have a complex over bothering people after years of dealing with it.
There Goes Your Tip
There is a special place in hell for the kind of people who vocally threaten a server or bartender’s tip. If you don’t want to leave a tip, don’t leave one. If you want to speak to management about poor service, ask to speak to management. But never throw an expression like “there goes your tip” around like you’re reprimanding a child. No matter how bad the service, a bartender would never say those words.
I Wish I Had an Office Job
Most bartenders bartend because they’re not the nine-to-five type. Yes, sometimes we long for weekends off and our nights free, but in general, we’re pretty happy living our lives in reverse. After all, we make our living off of the minions that have an immense need for a drink after the day that they had at their office job.
Final Thoughts
It is important to understand that once you step behind the rail, you’re on stage. An entertainer, a diplomat, a confidant, a priest, basically, whatever is needed to build your bar and keep your patrons happy. You must always be aware of the effects the things you say to your customers will have on them. You do, after all, make your living off of them.
Part 4 - Still Growing
As You Grow
This is specifically about moving on from the local hometown favorites to the big city. Resort destinations like New York, San Francisco, or Chicago. Every state has at least one. It’s like graduating from Harvard or MIT or getting a diploma from the local community college. Whether your goal is to work a five-star dinner house or the best nightclub in the area, there will always be new and exciting things you’ll need to realize and learn.
The Money
With a good bartending job, you can earn a lot of money, but there are no guarantees of a steady income. Much of a bartender's income comes from their tips, so the type of establishment, the time of year, the shifts you're given and the customers that come in, will greatly impact how much you actually earn. Weather, the changing of the seasons, and sheer luck make it difficult to rely on your paycheck. Career bartenders can pull in six-figure salaries with benefits if they find the right gig. Of course, not all bar jobs will be that lucrative, but the combination of salary and tips, can be huge. Remember, tips are income, and according to the IRS, that makes them taxable. It is important to take that into consideration as your stuffing your nightly take into a coffee can when you get home. If you come from or migrate to a big city, keep in mind that the cost of living in most cities is going to be high, but in a resort, destination big city it’s ridiculous; but it’s easy to pick up work with so many bars and restaurants looking for good staff. It’s a bit of a trade-off, but many bartenders can earn white collar-level wages working behind the bar.
The Cachet
The biggest difference between bartending in a big city and any other city is the cultural capital it gives you. Of course, there are always people who look down on those who work in the service industry or who insist “that it’s not a real job.”
In New York, bartending is mostly seen as a cool, respectable way to make ends meet, as well as an amazing lifestyle choice. The same can be said for Chicago, Atlanta, Miami and San Francisco; but in reality, any big city offers the same benefits.
Sense of Urgency
Compared to the surrounding suburban areas, big cities are known for their fast pace, and bartenders will be required that same hustle. Servers and bartenders often hang back until their service is requested, while in the city, it’s all about anticipating the needs of your guests. It’s a much more proactive approach to serving drinks. If you can’t shift into high gear at a moments’ notice, you won’t last long at any big city bar.
The Lifestyle
The best part of being a bartender is the lifestyle it affords you. Weekdays off to explore the city are a great perk. Depending on where you work, work itself can be a party; and, by and large, your fellow bartenders are personable, creative, hardworking, fun-loving types that will join you at the drop of a hat. Patrons and staff often live within walking distance or a short cab ride. Whether you are Bartending in a big city or a small town, it is more than just a job, you become part of a community.
The Options
Other than bar owner, there isn’t much of a ladder to climb when it comes to the bar industry. In metropolitan areas, the options for career advancement are much greater. Liquor companies and distributors are always looking for reps, spirits specialists, and educators. Bars and restaurants often hire bartenders to consult on beverage programs and to design their new cocktail menus. The opportunities, and their respective egos, keep talented bartenders in demand.
The Hours
Working at a bar that closes at 4 or 6:00 AM means you’ll be getting home from work as your roommates are heading to the office. The hours are not for the faint of heart.
Working double shifts that can last 12-16 hours is the norm; and being able to handle the long hours is like a badge of honor for big city bartenders. Remember that as part of this elite community, you are working hard… and playing hard.
Final Thoughts
One of the great things about bartending is that you can always try to learn (or create) new drinks, work on better rapport with customers, and pick up new tricks. Bartenders who keep pushing themselves tend to like their jobs more. Getting a Cicerone Certification for an expanded knowledge of beer or going through Sommelier training for your wine knowledge that I recommend for every want-to-be bartender. Every small town or big city has its own unique environment. From the local sports teams to the weather, everything and anything can affect how your bartending career transpires. Assume nothing, pay attention, and have some fun.
Habits You Pick Up
We all develop certain behaviors, thanks to the influence of our work. Nurses tend to wash their hands more often than is necessary and firefighters check the stove buttons a little too often; and bartenders are no exception. Over time, we carry the things we repeatedly do at work into real life. From knowing exactly how you like your martini shaken not stirred to refusing to split a check, here are a few habits you pick up bartending.
Selective Hearing
Bartenders are trained to listen for certain sounds and respond accordingly. It can be the sound of the front door opening, the printer printing out a drink ticket, or a bar stool sliding back. When you hear it, you stop what you’re doing and spring into action. On the flip side, we’re also experts at tuning things out, particularly the sounds of bar guests’ conversations. A good bartender, who is paying attention, can have his or her back to the customers, and still discern the individual conversations... who needs a drink, and who wants to cash out.
Always Prepared
When you’re bartending, you never know how busy your bar will be, because every night is a little different. The absolute worst thing you can do is to assume that it’ll be a slow night. Because if you do, a sudden rush will leave you scrambling. For this reason, we always prepare to be busy.
We carry this spirit of preparedness into all areas of our lives. A simple trip to the beach means packing three different types of sunscreen, a book, a magazine, a frisbee, a flask, and a giant bottle of water. As you start your shift behind the bar... your garnish is cut and labelled, the ice bins are full, the fruit mixes are prepared, and all liquor is backed up.
All About The Music
A part-time DJ is a priority. You should always be in control of the playlist. When you bartend, music is your fuel. A bad song can cause your energy level to crash and derail your flow; and as important as it is for you, the bartender, it is even more important for your guests. We have to remember that the balance is the key. The volume level and type of music is critical to a happy crowd. Happy hour will require a more upbeat sound than the music that will keep a dinner crowd comfortable; and a busy room will need to have the volume turned up a notch. Your customers ability to enjoy themselves weighs heavily on the atmosphere you create.
Never Split Your Check
You will never... never split your check. That doesn’t mean you’ll always pick up the entire tab, or that we won’t all contribute money to a check, but a table of bartenders will never throw down six credit cards to split the bill. Either we all chip in cash, Venmo each other, or take turns treating our friends. We know how annoying it is for a server or bartender to have to split checks on multiple cards, so we try to avoid that situation as a point of pride and respect for the individual serving you.
Order Clear & Concisely
One of the biggest pet peeves of busy bartenders is indecisive guests; or a guest too busy to stop talking on their phone. We’re happy to offer suggestions but at the end of the day, just pick something already, and show a little respect. When you flip the switch from being a bartender to being a guest, please try to remember what you’ve been through when it’s your turn to order things. Be direct, clear, and try to order everything at once. The more customizations and additions, the more likely it is that the staff or kitchen will make a mistake. The chef has spent a lot of time and effort to create his menu, from cost to preparation; any customization could be at risk.
Our Drink Order
One of the perks of being a bartender is having the opportunity to develop your palate. Bartenders know how to order a martini or margherita, because we know how we like our martinis or margheritas. Going out with non-bartender friends is always a challenge because they’ll ask five questions just to order one drink.
Respect For Expiration Dates
Every bar and/or restaurant will eventually have to answer to The Department of Health. A good bartender will religiously check expiration dates on juices and milk because the one day that you forget to will be the day that the DOH does a surprise inspection.
In our everyday lives, when we visit friends and their fridges, we would never consider inspecting, and possibly finding expired condiments and old milk. Your customers wouldn’t do it either, but they will be the first to send the drink back if it doesn’t taste good, and God forbid, they get food poisoning. The DOH is there to remind us how important it is to maintain fresh ingredients.
Final Thoughts
Has anyone… ever… heard James Bond ask for any cocktail other than a martini, shaken not stirred? We are all creatures of habit. Fortunately, we spend a large part of our life going to bars and restaurants, from the 21 year old trying to get wasted to the 70 year old couple celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary, so the habits we pick up during our time spent behind the rail will greatly influence how we handle ourselves for the rest of our life.
Life Lessons
Bartenders spend their working lives tending to the needs of others. This nightly proximity to humanity teaches you many things about how to be a well-rounded person. Here are some life lessons, you and your friends may pick up from working behind the bar.
Don’t Be an Asshole
Never something most of us will ever admit to, and yes, this is the most obvious of life lessons, but somehow many people seem to have missed the memo. If I could take one lesson with me from my bartending life, it would be that a little understanding goes a long way. If the bar is crowded, give your bartender an extra minute before you order. Service should be greeted with appreciation, not expectation. I know that waiting for a drink at a busy bar can be frustrating, but nothing ruins a bartender’s mood faster than rude patrons.
Always Be Prepared
In the service industry, there is a saying: “Always expect to be busy.” The Monday Night football game was cancelled do to the snowstorm in the dead of winter, you still must make sure you stocked properly. Anything can happen when you are bartending. So that any possible complications that can be avoided… i.e. warm kegs or running out of limes… should be avoided. As in life, working in a bar can be very stressful. Preparedness takes some of that stress away.
If It Ain’t Broke… It Soon Will Be
Nothing is built to last forever and everything will fall apart eventually. As soon as you fix a broken printer, the ice machine stops working. You are almost out of the weeds when a glass shatters in your ice. The more you can anticipate potential issues, the more you can prevent being caught off guard. Bar owners love band-aids, but we all know that the more band-aids you slap on, the more costly the wound in the long run. And when things do break, fix them immediately.
When You Are The Problem
Believe it or not, sometimes you are the problem. The bartender sets the vibe for the whole bar. We are the host of the party. I know I said before that customers can be assholes, but sometimes we are the bigger assholes. On those nights, when it feels like every patron is giving you a hard time, you have to take a hard look at your own energy. When we are stressed or annoyed, we give off negative vibes. Guests often, unintentionally, absorb that energy and reflect it back to us. It is vital to take a beat and try to let it go. Change the music, restock the beer cooler… twice, polish a few wine glasses. The music will change your mood, the beer cooler will cool you off, and the polished wine glass will make the wine you choose to drink more palatable.
When You Are The Solution
Conversely, we have the power to make a person’s day better. Sometimes, focusing on the customer experience, taking the time to really chat with a new guest or crafting a special cocktail for a regular, can both improve our mood and make someone else happy. It’s karma… Nothing gets you out of your own head better than being generous to another person.
Do The Best You Can
Do the best you can with what you got. No one is perfect. Some nights you are underprepared. Some nights you are caught off guard. Some nights you are tired or sick or just not in the mood. In those moments, you have to take a breath and say to yourself, “I’m doing the best I can with what I got.” It might not be as good as it was yesterday. It might not be as good as it will be tomorrow, but it’s the best you’ve got today. Until the robots take over our jobs, (and that is already in place with cocktail dispensers), that’s all anyone can ask for.
This Too Shall Pass
Every night at the bar is a reminder that you can get through anything. No matter how busy or how boring, you always make it to the end of your shift. In those moments, when your customers are in “full moon” mode and you are drowning in drink orders, it’s helpful to remind yourself that it won’t last forever. Last call is always on the horizon.
Final Thoughts
Normally, it isn’t until you reach senior citizen age that your friends and family appreciate all that you have learned during your time on earth. And it’s amazing how smart your parents become when YOU reach the age of 30. The life lessons discovered while you’re behind the bar gives you a substantial head start to the rest of your life.
Things Bartenders Love to Hate
Bartenders learn to comfort themselves by complaining about the little things. From making vodka-based drinks to watching customers on a dating app date, here are a few things bartenders love to hate.
Vodka
It’s flavorless, malleable, and vodka sodas are the perfect “I want to drink all night and not be too hungover” drink. Once considered boring and the cheap alternative to the snobbish gin drinkers, Vodka has had several rebirths with literally hundreds of different flavors now available. From fruit to flowers, there are a ton of drink variables, and a true mixologists’ go to when getting creative.
The Music
Even if it is our own playlist, and I’m not quite sure why we’re so picky, but if a song has the wrong vibe at any given moment, we’ll stop what we’re doing to change it. The music can dictate the mood of your bar and it starts with you, if you’re enjoying the music, you will be able to handle most of the stress of your shift. We’ll even vow to never play that particular song at our bar ever again. But then, on the right night, it’ll come over the speaker and we’ll sing along to every word.
Anything Trending
It is not physically possible to know every trendy cocktail, whether created by the bartender down the street, or the bar manager at the new hotspot in Vegas; whenever a drink takes off in popularity, even if it’s a good drink, bartenders quickly start to hate it. Spicy margaritas, frozen drinks, wine spritzes, and anything with mezcal has the potential of putting your bartender on the offensive. If you order it, the bartender will judge you. But if you really like a trendy cocktail, give it a few years. We even love making old fashions now.
Online Dates on Your Bar
We either love them or hate them. The voyeur in us certainly gets a kick out of this unabashed view of a stranger’s dating life, and our hearts fill with joy when a date seems to go well for them; and of course, we’ll probably take the credit for that. But why bring every date to the same bar? Some might say it’s to feel important and go where “everyone knows your name”, but really, you’re already experimenting on the new date… try a new bar and save me for the 2nd and 3rd dates; we’ll all have more fun.
Trashy Cocktails
There are certain cocktails that only amateur drinkers tend to order; and for that select group, it’s usually because they are on a mission to get totally shit-faced. For some, it’s the cosmopolitan; for others it’s the Long Island iced tea. We will roll our eyes while making them, but secretly, we wish we could be having them with you. One word of warning, if you order an espresso martini, make sure the bartender is in a good mood… because they’re delicious.
Regulars
The number one thing we love to hate. We love our regulars. You can’t run a successful bar without them; and for the most part, it’s how we make a living; but they do require a lot of energy. There will be some nights you just aren’t up for it. On occasion, you’ll need your co-bartenders to entertain your regulars because you just don’t have it in you. A good trick I have found to be extremely successful is to introduce them or start a conversation for them with the person next to them… that way they can entertain each other.
Final Thoughts
Everyone has an opinion, but while you’re behind the bar, you must utilize some semblance of decorum and respect, regardless of how much you hate what’s going on around you. Afterall, the patrons usually have no idea how bad they can be perceived by the staff, and you are after all, the reason some of them come in.
Part 5 - Observations
Never Date a Bartender
Being the life of the party and the keepers of the alcohol make bartenders inherently appealing. But bartenders can also be a challenging group to date. From unsociable hours to jealousy issues, here are a few reasons you should never date a bartender. However, a date with a bartender can be full of landmines, so if you want to impress your soon to be better half, you need to set boundaries. Although you’re going to have to be nice to people, you'll also need to be careful not to be too nice. Getting romantically involved with a customer is almost always a bad idea. If you’re not good at setting social boundaries, you’ll probably want to avoid this line of work.
Losing Your Favorite Bar
You may eventually become a true couple or lose your favorite bar; and sometimes both. A potential consequence of dating a bartender is that when if you break up, you may feel uncomfortable going back to the bar where they work. Depending on how long you dated, you can usually resume bar visits once there has been an adequate grace period. But it will always be a little awkward, especially if you’re with the next love of your life.
The Hours
Unless you work a similar schedule, or a bartender yourself… lucky you; the bartender work schedule can be tough to accommodate. Your bartender boo will be stumbling into bed as you’re getting up for work. Their schedule often changes by week or season. And forget making vacation or weekend plans. This won’t always be true, but if you want to tend bar where the money is, then you’d better plan on being up all night and sleeping in all day. There will be bartending opportunities that could be more compatible for your relationship but the better job opportunities and better money, will usually be in traditional bars and remain open until around two in the morning, which usually means you may see yourself stumbling into bed around four in the morning.
Trust Issues
Flirting is part of a bartender’s job description. You need to be very trusting or have clear boundaries. We usually don’t mean anything by it, but it takes a secure partner to feel comfortable with that scenario. After all, keeping the bar patrons entertained is how we pay our bills. If the bar is filled with women hoping for a hookup, they are also tipping. If the bartender is obviously not available, the tipping ladies no longer come by. If you aren’t in an exclusive relationship, you need to expect that your bartender date may be picking up other dates while at work. Which means no impromptu visits to their job unless you’re invited. This situation can work, but it will challenge your jealousy gene.
Date Nights
Scheduling a date night is always good, but not always possible. Half of your date nights will be visiting them at work. One workaround for the aforementioned schedule situation is that you can visit them at their job. Free drinks are a perk, for sure, but being at your significant other’s workplace gets old fast. You don’t want to overstay your welcome with their co-workers and bosses. Plus, you never know if it will be so busy that it’s not even worth it for you to be there.
Alcohol
Alcohol will likely be a part of your relationship. Most bartenders are either completely sober or total drinkers with not much in-between. This means that alcohol (or lack thereof) will always be a part of your relationship. Depending on your personal relationship with alcohol, this can range from a non-issue to dealbreaker. The most toxic relationship type is bar rat and bartender. This one never ends well.
Our Persona
A bartender usually is not the same person at work as they are at home. We expend most of our social energy at work, and bartenders often need quiet time on our days off. This can be hard when you’re dating someone new. They often expect you to be the fun-loving, energetic bartender personality that they first met, and it can be disappointing when your off-duty vibe is much different; and all you want to do is relax and take care of your personal business… laundry, dry cleaning, shopping… the fun stuff.
Questions Not to Ask
“What drink should I order?”
“I don’t like that you work nights.”. Sometimes, neither do we, but it is what it is. If this relationship progresses, you will have to discuss the realities of opposite schedules. On a first date, however, just enjoy getting to know each other.
“I’m such a lightweight.”. You don’t have to be a big drinker to date a bartender. If you do drink, pace yourself on the first date. Bartenders can hold their liquor, so if our date is wasted after one glass of wine, it may not be the right fit.
“Does this mean I’ll get free drinks?” If we invite you to visit us at work, we will obviously hook you up with the bottomless wine special, but that shouldn’t be the main selling point of the relationship.
“You must get numbers all the time.” Put all your bartender assumptions to the side, at least for the duration of the first date. First off, this idea is outdated, because in the days of app dating, people rarely leave numbers anymore. Second, what is likely meant to be a flirty joke reads to us a little as insecurity.
“Are you an actor?” Most bartenders do have other jobs and aspirations beyond mixing drinks. But it is a pet peeve when strangers just assume we’re waiting for our big break. Some of us are actors as well as performance artists, students, teachers, musicians, and even restauranteurs in the making.
Final Thoughts
A professional bartender may be the perfect fit for your current lifestyle choice but try to look at it from your potential significant other’s point of view… it won’t be easy. I was extremely lucky. I was a bartender when I met my wife. After more than a decade behind the rail, I was ready for a change and asked her to marry me after just 2 weeks of dating. She said yes, but she had me wait for over a year before she was comfortable with her decision.
It’s important to keep in mind that you don’t have to be a bartender forever. It can be something that you can choose to do for just a little while and it’s not necessarily right as a career. Many people bartend while working toward their education and dream job. There are also a lot of people that like bartending so much that they choose to make a lifelong career out of it. The great thing about becoming a bartender is that you’ll always be able to fall back on the experience if you need to do so in the future. It’s usually good money, and there are usually bartending jobs available all over the world, so it’s a good skill to have even if you don’t do it full-time for long. Personally, I gave up the craft after 15 years to get married and start a family; 35 years later my wife told me that I should go back to bartending again because it was the only time I was really happy. She was retired, the kids moved out of the house, and she thought it was time for me to be happy again… after only 35 years? Now I can be happy? WTF.
Unique Customer Observations
Customers sitting at your bar will be your biggest critics; and they are watching everything that you do. They will always have an opinion and very few will keep that opinion to themselves. Your regular customer, (your “bar friend”), sitting next to the server’s station, watching the register, watching who you talk to and who you spend time with, will take notice of everything you do, and everything you do wrong.
Dirty Glassware
For any customer, a clean glass is required. For a wine drinker, a polished, clean wine glass is a prerequisite for an exceptional wine experience. Having a bartender serve a drink in a dirty glass looks bad for them, the establishment, and shows a total disregard and lack of respect for the customer. There should never be lipstick around the rim of the glass or water spots on any glass.
Spend the necessary time to make sure your glassware is ready to start your shift; it will affect your service level and your tips. They now have created lipstick that will last all day, so please don’t expect the dishwasher behind the bar to get it all off on the first pass.
The Mixing Tins
When a bartender picks up a tin and smells it before starting to make the drink… what’s your first thought? Poor cleaning issues or is having the bartender’s nose in the tin more disgusting? Mixing Tins should be rinsed after each use. There are very few liquors that would leave a strong smell and after taste; and a good bartender should remember when that particular liquor is used and spend the necessary time to make sure the tin is cleaned after use.
Draft Beer
Watching a bartender attempting to pour a draft beer, and watching it come out all foam, is like watching money being poured down the drain… literally. Warm refrigeration lines, a poor nitrogen mix, and/or storage issues are just a few reasons this can occur. On occasion, the bartender might be at fault, but usually it’s management.
Straws
Whether tall or short, the straws used in a cocktail are usually used to stir the cocktail, and not used to drink through. For the new bartender, try to remember that they will never… ever… be used in a draft or bottle beer… just saying.
The Glass Ice Scoop
Using a glass to scoop up the ice to make a drink is a recipe for disaster. A cocktail glass does not have the tinsel strength of a diamond; and will be easily chipped when it is driven into the ice bin.
Having chipped glass in your ice will cost you customers, and after consumed; could be huge medical and legal fees. Every bar and restaurant will have an ice scoop. Yes, it’s not as convenient as picking up the glass you’re going to make the drink in, but… get over it.
A Clean Bar
The quickest and easiest way to find yourself in “the weeds,” and literally buried behind the bar, is to not keep up with the dirty dishes… clean as you go. Having dirty glassware and lunch plates will just get in the way when your rush hits; not to mention the possibility of running out of clean glasses to make your drinks.
Father Joe
A weak moment in my life, when the staff, and my employer, insisted that I get dressed up in a Halloween costume. I took a white cocktail napkin from the bar, folded it, and using scotch tape, attached it under the collar of my black shirt. That was years ago, and I can still say to my followers, with a straight face, to drop to their knees in front of me…and beg for forgiveness.
Final Thoughts
Remember, you may believe that you are KING behind that bar; and that you are aware of everything that goes on there. But also remember, you’re working, your customers aren’t; and they have a hell of a lot more time to watch and take notes on all of your screwups… and they will not forget.
Worst Things to do in a Bar
There is a code of conduct implicit in being a guest at a bar. Even though bartenders shouldn’t have to tell you… here is a list of the absolute worst things you can do in a bar.
Harassing the Bartender
Harassment comes in many shapes and sizes. Asking us to shake our ass, making comments about our physical appearance, asking about our sex lives, asking personal questions about our hopes and dreams, giving unsolicited advice about how we live our lives or how we bartend, and addressing us as “hey you” or “bartender” or slamming on the bar to get our attention.
Free Shit
Expecting free shit seems to go with the territory. Bartenders often have an abundance of freedom to buy a drink for a regular or offer a round of shots to some friendly bar guests; it’s part of the entertainment. The problem arises when guests start to expect free drinks every time they come in or express their displeasure on receipt of a bill that includes everything that they drank. There is a science to giving away a drink, and it is not just to make an extra buck or two. The bar business is still a business and giving a good customer an extra drink to say thank you or to celebrate a special occasion, is a privilege we enjoy using, but hate abusing.
Stealing the Fruit
A bartender will take great pride in reminding you that it isn’t a buffet line. The number one deadly sin committed by bar patrons is putting your dirty hands in the garnish after the bartender took great pains to wear cloves while preparing the fruit trays. Not only is it against every health code in the country but stealing fruit out of the bar garnish tray is just not done.
That same customer will touch the straws intended for the mouths of other guests, play and reorganize the stack of bar napkins in front of them. If you’re prone to fidgeting, just play with your coaster or bite your nails; and if you really want an orange wedge or stuffed blue cheese olive, just ask. We’ll roll our eyes, but we’ll totally give it to you.
Multiple Tastings
When a patron asks to taste all of the wines by the glass, then orders a beer, is simply rude and inconsiderate. If you want to sample a specific wine or have a small taste of a beer before deciding on your drink order, sure, no problem. Wasting your bartender’s time, asking to try every wine on the list… that is not okay. This isn’t Baskin Robbins. And if you’re going to waste our time, at least order a damn glass of wine.
Demanding a Phone Charger
Please… of course we have a phone charger. Can you use it? Depends on how you ask; and what type of phone you have. If you’re nice about it, then by all means, our electricity is your electricity.
But if you approach it with an entitlement attitude and demand a charger as if it’s your right, then no. And please, if we do charge your phone, be patient. It needs more than a minute to juice up.
Savings Seats
Saving seats for your “potential” friends is only acceptable when you are 100% convinced that the friend will show up; but only for a short time. Every bar stool has a dollar amount that the establishment expects to collect from a customer using that seat to drink. In one of my favorite clubs, management expects a bar stool to generate a minimum of $100 an hour for the entire 8-hour shift; easy math, $100x8x15 bar stools=$12,000 a night.
There is no chance of reaching that number if a customer is saving an empty seat for the next great love of his life. The vast majority of bars are first come, first serve. While trying to politely hold a seat for one friend is fine, but you shouldn’t use your coat, bags, a purse, or body as a physical barricade, especially if you’re trying to hold more than one seat. Ask the bartender to put a drink or glass of water for a temporary fix, but if it’s a busy night, it’s every seat for themselves.
Demanding Service
Sit at a dirty bar and immediately demand service usually occurs when the patron doesn’t pay attention and has no patience. We all have a certain amount of pride in the work we do, and in its execution. When you immediately demand service before the bartender has a chance to clean the section of the bar and greet you, you’re telling that bartender that you are impatient, rude, inconsiderate and don’t trust their ability to do their job. It seems like a small thing, but we’re professionals and that behavior is offensive. First, give us the opportunity to do our job; then of course, if you’ve been waiting unacknowledged for more than a few minutes, demand away.
Final Thoughts
That code of conduct that we expect as professional bartenders is just that, an expectation, nothing more. The more successful you and your bar are, the more you will have patrons that you haven’t had the opportunity to train and educate… Get used to it.
Part 6 - The End
Habits You Can’t Shake After Leaving Bartending
You can take the bartender out of the bar, but… between over tipping, sleeping in, and being an entertainer that can make everyone else feel comfortable, there will be several habits that are hard to shake... even when you leave the profession.
Over-tipping
We will never stop over-tipping. Its now in our DNA. Even when not warranted, even when we receive bad service, tipping below 20 percent isn’t an option. It will annoy our family and friends, and it’s not great for our bank account, but it’s our way of “paying it forward” and putting some positivity into the world. You will never forget just how important those tips are to the server who has rent to pay or may have kids to support.
Shots
Once again... for bartenders, shots aren’t about getting drunk, shots are about camaraderie and having a good time. Alas, getting drunk can be an inevitable byproduct, but it’s often not the goal. Even after we leave the industry, shots remain our go-to whenever we sense a social function that needs an injection of fun. You will eventually out-grow the need for shots, but please, enjoy while you’re able.
Sleeping-In
No alarm clock, breakfast in bed, and leisurely mornings listening to music are standard. Living life in reverse has its challenges, but slow mornings are one of its perks. It can be a rude awakening when trying to adjust to a new early morning ritual. As nice as it is to have nights off to relax and recharge, we’ll never stop wanting that extra morning time for pancakes, (or your significant other), in bed.
Staff Interaction
Imagine you’re at a fancy, catered affair... perhaps a wedding or a banquet. As your date, you decided to bring a friend who spent years working as a bartender. You come back from the restroom and your friend is nowhere to be found. What do you do? First, don’t get jealous or protective, and then check the service bar. Odds are your friend is chatting with the banquet servers and doing shots with the bartender, regaling stories of “back in the day”; once you find your tribe, it’s hard to let go.
Everyone Must Feel Comfortable
A good bartender will inherently have the need to make everyone else feel comfortable. You are an entertainer, and part of being a great bartender is making your bar guests feel comfortable. Social situations provoke anxiety for most people. By making your bar guests feel welcome and recognized, it creates a bond of trust between you. From introducing your shy guest to a regular sitting next to them, to conversations covering multiple subjects, you are engaging them and keeping the action moving. Even after you leave bartending, you will find it hard to lose this character trait. At a work meeting, you’re the first with follow-up questions after a colleague’s presentation. Bartending teaches you how to be present and engaged with the people around you, which is a gift. At a party, you’re the one initiating conversation with the quiet girl on the couch.
Compulsive Hand Washing
Bartenders are constantly washing their hands. This is certainly a good thing. When you work with the public all day, you need to protect yourself. Every time you make a drink or clear a dirty plate or touch your hair, you rinse those hands. Even after you stop bartending, it is ingrained. This has become habit, especially after the pandemic.
Going Out Monday Thru Wednesday
For the professional bartender, weekends will always be the best bartending shifts. It’s busier, the money is better, and the “single” clientele comes out in droves. Besides, we all know that weeknights are the best nights for going out. The bars are less crowded, restaurants have tables available, and you never know what to expect. On the flip side, of course, lies the Thursday morning hangover. But if you learn one thing from bartending, it’s how to work through it.
Final Thoughts
Habits are hard to break, even when they are considered “bad” habits. Fortunately for us, many of the habits created as a bartender are amazing tools as you move on with your life. My wife still drags me to her church functions when she knows that they will probably be boring, and she expects me to interact and entertain the room.
Obsessions
The things that bartenders obsess over that the rest of the world doesn’t care about, from having perfectly ripe fruit to the cycle of the moon, here are seven things that bartenders find terribly important, but the rest of the world doesn’t really give a shit.
Perfectly Ripened Fruit
While everyone appreciates perfectly ripe fruit, bartenders have a chef-like obsession. It makes no sense to carefully craft a cocktail if you are serving it with a brown-edged lime, or a bad tasting orange slice. We’ll sort through boxes of citrus searching for the best-looking lemons, limes and oranges. The barback is sent to the grocery store to fetch fresh mint; and God help the incompetent bartender using the leftover garnishes from last night’s service.
Hand Cream
And lots of it. A well-manicured bartender isn’t easy to maintain, but essential when you are attempting to serve your customers with a little bit of class. Some bartenders are fiercely loyal to certain hand creams and oils, but as in most things, the most effective hand cream is whichever is readily available when you need it. Your hands will be in and out of water and ice; and will need to be taken care of. The onset of early stages of arthritis could be the result of poor maintenance; as well as the first impression you give a guest when you deliver their cocktail and they notice the dirty fingernails.
The Cycle of the Moon
A full moon brings out the strange, and the unexplainable. As a bartender, you must mentally prepare to work a bar shift on a full moon, when the crazies get crazier, and the normal rules of social behavior no longer apply. There will be some nights when it feels like none of your bar guests has ever been to a bar before; both your regulars and the tourists. Everyone’s communication feels off, everything feels heightened, and the alcohol hits the bloodstream more quickly. Chalk it up to superstition, but the moon has the power to affect a crowd.
Perfect Ice
Bartenders tend to be quite picky about what ice to use for certain cocktails — crushed, cubes, spheres — and when to put the ice in a drink. Ice can make or break a cocktail. Some say to ice the glass first for efficiency; others ice the glass last to stave off dilution. While most bar guests appreciate attractive ice, they rarely realize the thought process that goes behind it; and honestly, most couldn’t care less. There are entire chapters in cocktail books dedicated to the science of ice… from the type of water used to make it, to the size and shape of the cubes.
Splitting Checks
When out with friends, bartenders hate splitting the check. We’ll pay this time; our friends get us the next time. It all evens out in the end, and it feels good to take your friends out; plus, it saves time for the server or bartender who is taking care of us. Perhaps going Dutch is a better move, but who doesn’t feel like playing the high roller card every once in a while.
Knowledge of Digestifs
Bartenders have the luxury of tasting many different types of wine, beer, and spirits in our line of work.
Whether you are comfortable in the local dive bar of choice or progress to a five-star restaurant. As our palate develops, we start seeking out more and more complex flavor profiles. Pairing food with wine or beer becomes an art form. Enter the world of aperitifs and digestifs. Vermouth, amaris, bitters — these types of liqueurs come from a proprietary blend of herbs and botanicals, often with recipes that have been guarded with secrecy for hundreds of years. The new cocktail recipe pairings can inspire us.
Final Thoughts
Not a lot can be said about this section; but this could be a tough one to fix, but with a little luck, it too shall pass. Unfortunately, once you put an end to your bartending career, you may not worry about “perfect” fruit, but you will always notice what’s in your drink.
The Signs You’ve Been a Bartender Too Long
Free booze, mornings off, and getting paid to hang with your friends … bartending can be a really fun way to pay the bills. But everything good must come to an end. Here are the signs that you’ve been bartending for too damn long.
You’re Too Honest with Your Customers
Part of a bartender’s job is to fake it. When a guest asks, “How are you?” the last thing they want is the truth. They don’t care that you are on a double, that the sink is clogged, or that you are nursing an epic hangover and feel like a pile of garbage. When you start venting your frustrations to your customers, be prepared for them to back away and find a more receptive bartender… usually found in their next favorite hangout.
Inventing Reasons to Leave the Bar
You invent reasons to check the storage room. Sometimes kegs need to be changed and liquor needs restocking. But when you start making up reasons to leave the bar so you can smoke weed in the walk-in fridge, or hang out with your new favorite cocktail server, that’s a sign to hang up the shakers.
You’re Upset Because Someone Ordered Drinks
You get upset when a guest actually orders a cocktail. Serving and entertaining the patrons and making drinks is your job. Yes, a complicated cocktail order when you are slammed sucks. But when it is 5:30 PM on a Tuesday and a table orders Martinis, suck it up and make the damn Martinis!
Life
You know more about your regulars’ lives than the lives of your friends and family. Bartenders can be part-time therapists for their regulars. But when you know more about Tony, the real estate agent, and his divorce, diet, and zodiac chart than you do your own spouse’s, maybe it’s time to re-examine your priorities.
Taking Shortcuts
You take shortcuts when you have plenty of time. Fresh ice, perfectly-cut garnishes, beautifully-prepared drinks; to most bartenders, making a great drink is a source of pride. But when you’ve been doing it for so many years, pride can turn to apathy. Like with most things, (pun intended), look for the limp shake. It’s a definite sign that your bartender doesn’t give-a-fuck and it can’t be corrected by a little blue pill.
You’re a Slut
You’ve slept with all the attractive singles at the bar. It’s Friday night, you’re making drinks, you’re in the zone, feeling hot. You take a quick scan of the room, and you realize you’ve already hooked up with a third of the bar. It’s an occupational hazard, but also a sign to move on to greener pastures. You have nothing left to prove and your reputation has already been destroyed.
From a Single Patron to Family Man
You’ve seen couples go from first date to kids in school. Bartending can sometimes feel like Groundhog Day. In other industries, with steady streams of projects and promotions, you constantly mark the passage of time. Why can’t I find the love of my life? Why can’t I settle down and find a “real” job? In bartending, witnessing other people’s life achievements becomes your marker. It may seem charming, but it can mess with your mind.
Your Staff is Behind the Bar
You let other people come behind the bar. The area behind the bar is your domain and you are the master. Most bartenders are fiercely territorial over their space. Not because they are assholes, but because every time someone moves a shaker or misplaces a liquor bottle, it slows you down and can throw off your flow. But when you get to the point that you’d rather have the servers just pour their own beers, you are beyond over it.
You’re a Dick
You’re kind of a dick for no apparent reason. When you feel yourself being rude to customers for little things, like asking for water, you need to take a break. You’ve exhausted your “be nice to strangers” muscle and it needs some R&R. Take a weekend off, or maybe a “speed run.” Speed Run definition: When you and 2 or 3 of your bartender friends take off and drink… excessively… for NO Less than 3 days. From starting at 6 in the morning at the local dive bars to closing the best nightclub in the area… to hiding a flask of your favorite drink in a bowling bag and drinking at a 24/7 bowling alley until the 6 o’clock in the morning toilets open back up. Your customers and employer will thank you.
Pre-Game Workout
You need to have a pre-game routine before work. A shot or two to power through a busy night is normal. But when you need to wake up, take a shower, pop an aspirin, or chug a beer before work, you need slow down.
Fun on Your Day Off
You can’t enjoy going out to restaurants or bars on your days off. Like a soldier sent back in the field, being at a bar is like being at work. Years of bartending make you hyper-aware of your environment. How can you relax when you see the empty water glasses that should be filled or when a novice bartender shakes your Negroni instead of stirring? And God forbid that incompetent kid behind the bar wants you to help him get a better job.
Weekends
You don’t know what to do with yourself if you have a weekend off. Saturday night on the town? The thought fills you with dread. Plus, all your friends are probably working. Netflix and chill on your own? You’ve probably lost touch with all your non-service industry friends anyway. Sorry, but only the deepest friendships can survive years of opposite schedules; and hopefully, you have never had to throw them out of your bar.
Final Thoughts
The old saying that all good things must come to an end; is bullshit. Sometimes a simple fix can be the answer. Most of us can develop a bad attitude about work, but a change of location may help. Before giving up on an amazing profession, why not make a job change? Different management, new customers, new attitude… just saying.