The Inner Universe

The total or partial reproduction, retransmission, copying and/or redistribution of this book’s content in any medium, used without the written consent of the owner, is totally prohibited.

The following story is explained based on the author’s perspective on his understanding of the described topics. This book is not intended to fix, diagnose, and/or cure, so the use and application of the material in this book is the sole responsibility of the reader.

Illustrated by Anais Vaillant.

BIOGRAPHY

Since I was a child, I have been aware of a world beyond the physical. I also had sensitivity to that energetic world that we call spiritual. Those Gifts helped me see that my life purpose had to do with awakening people’s conscience, contributing to providing them with a better quality of life with a lower level of pain and a higher level of happiness.

Over the years, this led me on a journey of teaching and creating self-help courses, systems, and materials for people to awaken their consciousness and achieve their purposes in life with a higher level of peace, enjoyment, and harmony.

With the help of earthly teachers and the guidance of spiritual masters, I was able to gain clarity to move forward in my own life and gained greater wisdom on how to continue to contribute to the quality of life of others. This is how the Acceptance Technique was born. I use it nowadays and share it with many people in different countries to awaken their consciousness of love, peace, and happiness.

I’m passionate about what I do. Through the teachings of the Acceptance Technique, I continue to contribute to the awakening of people and embarking on this journey to a destination where peace, love, well-being, and happiness predominate.

Ricardo Martinez
Acceptance Technique Founder

The cold penetrated Isabel’s bones; she knew it could be warmer in the car, but she had reached her final destination, and after the big jump, there would be no more cold or heat.

She heard the sound of the river under her feet, with visions of the bridge growing farther and farther as she descended –she thought of a flock of pigeons saving her from her fate. Still, she was the only one who could control how that day would end, and it would be washed away by the icy waters, almost twenty meters below.

Isabel wondered when would be the famous moment when she began to remember her wanderings in life; if there was going to be a moment of regret, it’d better be now, but without a reason to wake up another day, Isabel now thought that nothing made sense anymore.

That day she was going to commit suicide.

She had a strange combination of thoughts in her head, and compared the experience to pulling a band-aid from the wound on your knee. It would hurt like hell because of the glue taking the hair with it, but the more you think about it, the worse it will be.

But it was her life, for heaven’s sake; it wasn’t a mere impulse or something like that; it was the ‘last steps.’ No one had asked her if she wanted to live in the first place, so now she was going to take the bull by the horns and decide if she was going to put an end or not. And the answer had been clear for a long time, only that Isabel preferred to ignore it so as not to give satisfaction to that mentality that drove her to chaos, or instead that made chaos a constant in her life.

So much to bear, and such a small person. Isabel said that she would regret that decision the next day, but there would be no the next day after that.

She took off her shoes, nauseous out of the nerves; vertigo had never been her friend, and this time would be no different.

She climbed on the edge of the bridge and took one last look around. Isabel thought it was a beautiful world, but she was touched by the worst circumstances, causing her not to enjoy it at all. The few good moments she had were cruelly snatched away to converge to that second, that moment where she walked to the front in search of the ultimate solution of all.

“If you do that, you’re going to fall.”

Isabel gave a sudden jump that almost made her slip. Dropped to her knees and thought about the horrible possibility of leaving the world without knowing who had spoken to her.

She looked back and saw an older man, wrinkles all over his face, with hair as black as night. Perhaps the only thing darker than his hair were the sunglasses he wore in the mist. The staff in his arms confirmed Isabel’s suspicions.

“You will fall, miss; best thing to do is to get down from there.”

“How did you get here?” Isabel said, confused, without connecting the dots of how a blind person could have reached a bridge in the middle of the field on a foggy day, and that he would identify her without showing signs of…nothing. For a moment, Isabel was afraid; she was scared of dying. And started crying.

The man was staring into the void as if not noticing the presence of Isabel, who was at his side. He insisted to get down of there, but Isabel was still stunned by fright.

“It will be fast,” she said, but the guilt appeared by having some kind of audience, even if he lacked sight. She wanted to be as discreet as possible. “It will be fast. Still, it’s not like you can see it.”

“Miss, I may not have the eyes to detail your hair color or your eyes, but even someone like me knows that it’s not a good idea what you are about to do.”

“It doesn’t matter at this point. I don’t understand how you got here, but I would appreciate if you leave. I wanna be alone.”

“So you can commit a mistake?” The man gave a deep laugh. “Haha, no thanks. I cannot allow myself to have that in my consciousness.”

“It’s not like I can’t change this either.”

“No?”

It was the first time the man was interested; he had a slight smile that transmitted a strange feeling of distrust and security to Isabel.

“Miss,” he continued, “What’s your name?”

“Isabel, and you?”

“That doesn’t matter now, I’m going to help you, but the first step is to let yourself be helped. If you have the will to improve your life, you will be able to follow me. If not, I won’t take more time from you.”

“I’m not interested, I’ll say it straight away; I looked for help on many sites. Religion, support groups, not even my friends gave me a solution, so I opted for the one I thought was less useful but more effective. I can’t believe this is happening; no offense.”

The man wasn’t alluded. He only told that he understood that our methods on many occasions will not always be adequate. Still, when we run out of options, the only thing we can do is continue looking for solutions.

“And when will we know when to stop?”

“Even when we have the right option, we shouldn’t stop.”

As they spoke, Isabel settled on the edge of the bridge; she felt the solidity of the stone beneath her, about how she was still able to be there even when only a few minutes ago she thought all was lost.

“Very moving, sir, but I still don’t believe all this. I don’t want to bother you, and it would be good if you go. I don’t want you to get in trouble because of me.”

“How is that possible?”

“If anyone sees you here, they’ll think you were involved in this.”

“In that case you should desist!”

Isabel panicked that a person like him would be in that exact place to prevent something greater from happening. It was one of those bizarre coincidences to be told in a meeting with friends.

“So, what do you want me to do now? To think that my life will get better just like that? I’ve used positive thoughts, psychology, affirmation words, and yet everything remains the same.” Isabel had broken down; nothing could comfort her anymore. “Fortunately, you’re here, so even if I have someone by my side, no one can look at my pain.”

“There is a way.”

“No, there is not.”

“There is not because you don’t want to see beyond. You’re stuck, and you need something to keep you grounded. Do you like to learn to manage your emotions, put anger aside, and see another way out?”

“Who are you?”

“I’ll take that as a yes. I will wait for you when you decide.”

When the man turned around, in a mere impulse to reach for his shoulder, Isabel slipped off the bridge’s edge, her foot falling into space. It was fortunate that she could hold onto the railing. Maybe it wasn’t going to be a slip that took her into the void. Still, when she felt her nails embedded in the stone on edge, she knew there was a moment, a tiny instant in which she worried about not dying; to stay alive. To have one more breath, quite the opposite of Isabel from just a few minutes ago.

Before uttering any words, Isabel looked around, only to find a trail of fog that covered even her parked car. For brief moments she thought she did jump off and went to heaven, seeing an angel by her side, but each step felt so natural and devoid of transition to the afterlife. She believed it was a dream or her mind sabotaging the suicide. Went to her car, put on her shoes, and cried; she cried like never before in her entire life, more than with any fall, push, break, or betrayal. Isabel flood so much from her poor eyes that she thought she would never see again without a sea of tears in front of her.

She checked the glove compartment to see if there was anything to chew on, gum or some candy. The knot in her stomach turned into a void. She wanted to fill it up as soon as possible to calm her anxiety, even if it was just biting something, but there were other plans for Isabel.

She flopped down on the seat, finding a gum stick and a small cream card. Upon checking, it had some letters in a very careful typeface, with a text that revealed a direction and a phrase: Learn the Acceptance Technique now.

It hadn’t been an illusion, and for the first time in years, Isabel wanted to take one more breath.

CHAPTER 1

Isabel knew she wouldn’t have an easy life when she saw her mom walking out the front door, this being the last time she would be with her. For days she asked what happened, but given the lack of answers, she thought that her mother simply went buying something without telling anyone –a gift for her. For years, Isabel continued with the childish thought that at any moment, her mom would be entering through the same door saying, “surprise!” That never happened, but little could the five-year-old Isabel know.

Her childhood was like a roller coaster that kept falling, starting with her father. Years later, Isabel understood that her father’s high-sounding behaviors weren’t common among dads (or average men). They were only consequences of drunkenness that began in his youth, and never knew when to stop. When the anger outbursts came, her father lit cigarettes and extinguished the matches’ fire with his fingertips, rinsing them with abundant saliva. One day he told little Isabel that she could do the same, but only managed to make her little fingers come out burned and blackish; that caused her problems when she had to give her first fingerprints on the IDs, but at the time, Isabel thought she had made a mistake on her side. She even couldn’t do that well (told to herself), and therefore, she was a failure to her dad.

When her mom was absent, and at the father’s insistence for a female figure to surround the house, Isabel had to clean, cook, shop, and everything while attending an only-girls’ school in the city. This greatly affected Isabel’s performance in class. Low marks were translated into scolding from her father, more errands and chores, less time to study, and the cycle restarted. There were nights when Isabel went to bed crying, thinking that at any moment, a blue fairy godmother would come to rescue her, or at least a prince on his steed, who would cross the starry skies to take her to the moon.

The first encounter with a boy occurred during her last year of school, where she and her classmates met the boys from the only-boys’ school on the other side of town; there was to be a group dance, so preparations for the event began. When the boys saw the fine ladies of the academy, they couldn’t contain their wishes and cornered them in one of the corridors, while the teachers and other students were in the room, decorating. They came like lions to the defenseless deer, filling them with sweet words and empty promises that even they couldn’t believe, but the young ladies seemed to move and captivate as if they were little Shakespeares.

Isabel got a small, skinny boy with plastic tape-covered glasses and freckles even in the bags under his eyes. He said over-the-top words on his parents’ jobs that Isabel disliked it. The straw broke the camel’s back happened when this boy approached her, searching for a safe kiss. Isabel pushed him away, giving a little cry out of nerves. By resisting, she accidentally knocked over the young man’s glasses, breaking them on the spot. This caused the anger of more than one.

It turns out that the boy was trendy among his people for having more money than the average, and this same money from Daddy and Mommy managed to offer the best entertainment to his classmates. When he felt alluded to, everyone was reluctant towards Isabel. The brotherhood between the boys seemed to be so strong as to make everyone leave the site to continue helping decorate. This didn’t please Isabel’s companions.

At first, they applied a cold shoulder on her, but each second, they grew increasingly disappointed that silly Isabel had ruined their chance to go to the major leagues with the boys. That day, Isabel lost the little relevance she had in the classroom and gained the hatred of her colleagues, which resulted in an encounter that she couldn’t forget for years to come.

She only made a detour to get water before going home, and she wondered what would have happened if she had just kept going the same way like every day. But no, Isabel had to go to the drinking fountains to meet Claudia and the others, reminding her that sometimes it was better to go with the flow rather than confront the system. There were blows, kicks, hair pulling, and even a hit in her left breast, sending her an electric shock that lasted a week. She would comment this to her father and management, only to be attacked again, in a much worse way. She thought at one point that she would die at the hands of girls her own age, unable to seek comfort anywhere. That was enough to be put in a mixed school the following year, not achieving close friendships in there, but getting along with her new classmates.

Years passed, and Isabel was developing more as an adult and had a small victory when in her internships, she managed to go to the capital (although she preferred anywhere other than her father’s house). She promised that she would be a new person by now, ready to eat the world.

Isabel’s first encounters at the company offices were turbulent, as it was adapting to the lifestyle in the big city; luckily, she was good at learning and nurturing knowledge, knowing that everything she captured could be useful at some point. This gave her great esteem from her bosses and co-workers, who saw her as a fundamental member of the company’s development.

Sadly, not all members were equally competent. Just a month after being accepted for a steady job, the company closed, leaving her stranded in the big city for a few weeks until her wits allowed her to get out of an interview airy for the waitress position.

It wasn’t bad for her; in fact, she was able to earn almost as much as before with enough tips by the end of the day. Isabel thought she would manage to survive this way (she would do anything instead going back to her old home with an abuser at all times). That’s when she met Matias.

Matias went from being a mere face with a question mark in the restaurant to a well-known model among the customers, along with the fat man on Fridays, or the lady who always ordered a Caesar salad without chicken (impossible not to remember someone like that). He was first known to everyone as the coffee cup boy until one of Isabel’s co-workers told her that he was more interested in familiar company than coffee.

“What are you talking about?”

“Honey,” said her friend Angela, “let’s be honest, our tuna sandwich is world-finest, but we fell short on coffee, and it must be two options: he’s very desperate or he lost the taste in their mouth, but in both scenarios, you are the common denominator.”

“Not at all; he can come for any of us, even for you.”

“I doubt it; When you were absent on Wednesday, he asked me if the pretty girl with the ponytail skipped.”

Isabel had tied her hair in a ponytail since the horrible beating at the drinking fountains years before. She still felt the pulling of his hair, and wanted to put it all together so as not to believe that at any moment, she could get tangled up with anyone’s fingers. Still, Isabel didn’t think it looked any better. In fact, she felt that she had lost a bit of beauty with the years, and knowing that someone else found in her a sign to stand out made her feel strange.

When the boy went again, she asked to serve him and noticed how he smiled more than necessary. Isabel could see how more than one waitress seemed to give her naughty looks from the kitchen window.

“Excuse me, miss, you served me two sachets of sugar; usually, you only serve one.”

“Maybe the coffee is a little bitter today. I thought I would need it.”

“Thank you so much.”

Three times later, he would be working up the courage to ask her out together. One lovely night led to another, and after a month of sporadic dating, he took her to a different place: the restaurant where she worked. It felt strange to be on the other side, and asked Angela to bring them two coffees. Angela corrected her and brought her two iced teas. Isabel was very grateful.

Half a year later, Isabel thought she couldn’t live without Matias (she joked with his name because, according to Isabel, he didn’t have Matias’s face, but Miguel’s, which was quite close). It was the first time someone had treated her well in her life, like another human being. There were nights where she thought someone had cursed her since she was young, making everything more difficult, but now she saw that everything was actually in her head. Now she could finally be someone with an endless smiling face.

They never left the city, but explored it from head to toe; they ate in every street, took photos of every corner, and told all the jokes they knew (which weren’t many on Isabel’s side). Isabel had never been so happy in her entire life; suddenly, the romantic movies and love texts that she read took on a new meaning, and Isabel thought that was what anyone feels at least once in their life. She even meditated on the possibility of a new family; living with Matias becoming better and more solid.

She remembered how she had received a call from her father one day, commenting on how a neighbor died. He irritated Isabel with comments such as that it didn’t matter much since the guy was (in his father’s words) a closet fag.

“Dad, don’t say that; he was a human being like me and you.”

“Anyway, it was just some gossip. And how has everything been in the city? Can you lend me some greens?”

“What about the money I gave you two days ago?”

“Your aunt Aurora came; I had to make an emergency lunch for her.”

“Well…”

Matias stopped her, saying why she was bowing down to him if she knew well that her aunt Aurora had been in Spain for two years. She replied that it was better not to claim her father, but Matias didn’t understand how she could give so much power to someone else being so far away. She said it was a respect thing, but he told her that it wasn’t a valid reason to be abusive. In fact, there wasn’t a valid reason for it.

Isabel felt that Matias gave her stability, that he was the cornerstone of her mind, and that she would be lost without him. She didn’t know how people could have mental strength without a Matias in their life.

It was a Thursday when she received a call from Matias’s work. They told her that an accident occurred in the loading area, causing several racks to fall suddenly; there were even two deaths in the process, and unfortunately, one of them wouldn’t be accompanying her to dinner that night.

Isabel wept like never before in her life. She thought she was returning to being a helpless little girl in the jaws of a city ready to eat her alive. She didn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.

She lamented so much that she spent days without eating a bite, which affected her performance in her job. Her boss said that the warning season was over and that he couldn’t afford such a worker with much regret. He wouldn’t like to fire her, but she accepted his words in a good way and told herself that she would go home with her father.

Indeed, life seemed to lose color again. She didn’t understand how to survive alone, and less than alone, with bad company. Her father was indifferent to her situation (the only expressiveness he showed was in the form of ‘and where’s dinner, gurl?’). Isabel believed at one point that it was no longer worth waking up in the morning.

She tried going out with old friends but had accomplished so much in the capital that now she didn’t feel comfortable even in her own home. She met new faces and even went out with other men (of course, it happened at least two years after Matias’ death when her friends insisted that she should try to get back to her life). She was young and couldn’t afford to remain stagnant. She started dating Leo, with whom she felt new emotions, a little more intense than the relaxed state that Matias gave her. It was like firing a gun for the first time, only she always felt that way, and at times she was overwhelmed by so much intensity; sometimes, she just wanted to be lying on the couch, watching a series, or walking in the park.

Leo helped her get a new job. It was in a small insurance company. Although she wasn’t earning as well even as a waitress, at least it kept her distracted enough to forget the low points of her life.

For her first four months, she wanted to do something nice to Leo; Isabel bought him a small heart-shaped cake, with an L + I, along with some other goodies and the occasional letter made up of photo clippings. But just when she got to Leo’s house earlier, she found her Romeo in the hands of another lady, the one she once considered a friend, and took her advice to move on with her life. The reaction was short, just a “how could you?” that destroyed the hearts of both perpetrators and ran to her own house, where, instead of looking for consolation from his father, she just locked herself in her bedroom, never thinking of leaving that space safe.

The next day came a dismissal letter from the company, alleging inappropriate office behavior. Isabel dared to sue them but preferred to keep a low profile, taking her compensation (a minor consideration that went under the table between negotiations). But now, she was more stranded than ever, and her morale was as low as the fall that lay under the bridge she passed every day when she left her house.

That gave her an idea that a week later, she would be putting into action.

Of course, she would get drunk first before taking the big leap on the bridge. Isabel drank the entire bottle of her father’s rum with no regard for retaliation; after all, she wouldn’t be in that world by the end of the day.

Little would she know about a visit from an unusual person, and while her tears gnawed at her cheeks, stinging like tiny icy needles, she pondered whether at some point that day she had made the right decision. There was only one thing for sure: Isabel wanted to keep breathing to search for an answer.

Ricardo Martínez

INNER UNIVERSE- www.acceptancetechnique.com

INNER UNIVERSE- www.acceptancetechnique.com

BIOGRAPHY

INNER UNIVERSE- www.acceptancetechnique.com